Today, while in the shower with my girlfriend she was going on and on about how she thinks she's fat when she's in perfect shape. With what she said still on my mind, I meant to say "honey, you're so beautiful", but accidentally said "honey, you're so fat". I'll be sleeping alone tonight. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML
Today, while tucking my toddler in bed and telling her I love her, she responded with, "And I love your bouncy castle belly!" I know I'm overweight, but I didn't think I was that fat. FML
Today, while lying in bed with my girlfriend, she was grabbing the fat on my stomach. I said to her, "Quit touching my fat!" She replied, "So… don't touch you at all?" FML
Today, my friend was complaining about how fat she was. To make her feel better I said, "Psh, you're not fat! In fact we're about the same weight!" She looked at me for a second, then burst into tears sobbing, "I'm fat! I'm fat!" FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what she thought of a certain plus-sized vocalist, to which she replied, "She's gorgeous!" I said, "That's great because you remind me a lot of her." Now she's not talking to me. FML
Today, I was talking to a female friend online. She was typing out a story bit by bit about how awful she was feeling after being teased. I was responding with, "So, so true" but because of my slow typing it appeared after she wrote, "Doesn't help being fat." FML
Today, I told my girlfriend she was beautiful. She replied, "Lit." FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML
Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and said, "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML
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Top comments
alexandraa_fml 0
She deserves it for fishing for compliments.
24788 7
You know you wanted to say that because she's always bitching about her weight. I hate how fit woman say they are fat and need to lose weight. I'm so fat I can't eat one piece of brownie or it will go straight to my thighs... Good, I'm ******* glad then you won't break in half when I bend you over.
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Comments (124)
skyttlz 32
I've accidently said what was on my mind and it turns out weird or not making any sense.
lilluvowl 0
uk, I hate when people with high egos think people are"fishing for compliments" most of the time they have really low self esteem and need a confidence boost, I bet u have made people cry with ur big mouth.
SadinSherman 16
OP you are lucky that's all that happened to you.
dcbarret 0
dont feel bad dude, i did the exact same thing with my now ex fiance....you can guess part of the reason.
lextrack234 4
ur an idiot. u just screwed things for yourself big time
Megs431 6
hey I live in Vermont too XD
DeafWolverine 8
Fruedian slip? not so much..Freud wouldve told her to just bend over and take it like a woman
love2killu 21
Holy shitt I laughed so hard
needsagf14 12
That happens to me all the time
elizacandle 29
Those Freudian slips can really bite you in the ass.