Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man on the street and decided to give him the dollar bill I had left in my wallet. He said "Thank you" then as I turned to walk away, he muttered "Cheap-ass cunt". FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML
Today, while I was walking home, a homeless man saw me and didn't ask for change, but how much I charged. FML
Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called his bluff, and walked away. He wasn't bluffing. FML
Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him that I had none, he yelled angrily, "Who comes to this city without money?" I replied, "Apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
Today, I was walking through a rich part of the city and saw 2 dollars on the ground. I didn't pick it so people wouldn't think I was poor. FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
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Top comments
beerab 0
That's just MEAN on your part.
mardigrasqueen 0
You are a pompous bastard. You deserved a knife, not a pencil.
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Comments (813)
Dramamine 0
To those people saying Canada doesn't have paper money, it does. You're idiots.
XOfiestypixie 0
No, they're not saying we DON'T have paper money. We just haven't had $1 bills since 1989 (that's when they stopped printing them). Same as we no longer have $2 bills either; both were replaced by coins, the loonie and twonie. Candian bills start at $5. (Sorry if you're a fellow Canadian and already know this; just being extra thorough in my responses today)
Jemm_fml 29
I've never said YDI more profoundly than this. YOU DESERVED IT you heartless jerk. May you definitely have a taste of your own medicine one day.
kawa_fml 0
what the hell is your problem, OP? You deserved it, probably more than anyone else on FML, I must say.
live_laugh_learn 0
Thats such a cruel thing to do! You DEFINITLY deserved that one! If i was the homelesss person, I'd stab you with a pencil to..
a_homeless_guy 0
**** you
IronyHappens 0
You deserved that and much, much more. The fact that you even thought for a minute that this would elicit any kind of sympathy is pathetic and nauseating.
cani_fml 0
Yup. we all think it's funny cos you deserve it.
Mitz_fml 4
Cool! What, were there no little kids in wheelchairs for you to push over? I mean, you've got to feel superior in SOME way right? I hope you get a nasty infection in that leg. Asshole!
tazgrl 0
Of course an arrogant Torontonian (I assume that's where you are from, the centre of the universe) would be pompous enough to taunt a poor homeless person. You are lucky it was just a pencil in your leg. I would have punched you in the face.
XOfiestypixie 0
No, native Torontonians are actually nice; and he's probably not from Toronto itself, and from one of the (larger sized) suburbs instead, where a lot of the people are much snobbier. (There have actually been studies showing Toronto is one of the politest/nicest cities in North America).
NonExistance 0
Is it really worth tricking him for a few laughs and get stabbed in the leg? You could have just gave the guy a dollar and you would've been better off. YDI Jerk