Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man on the street and decided to give him the dollar bill I had left in my wallet. He said "Thank you" then as I turned to walk away, he muttered "Cheap-ass cunt". FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML
Crossed purposes
Today, while I was walking home, a homeless man saw me and didn't ask for change, but how much I charged. FML
Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called his bluff, and walked away. He wasn't bluffing. FML
Leave me alone
Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him that I had none, he yelled angrily, "Who comes to this city without money?" I replied, "Apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
Grab it while you can
Today, I was walking through a rich part of the city and saw 2 dollars on the ground. I didn't pick it so people wouldn't think I was poor. FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
Top comments
beerab 0
That's just MEAN on your part.
mardigrasqueen 0
You are a pompous bastard. You deserved a knife, not a pencil.
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Comments (813)
oryon1033 0
you're a ******* prick
PenNameHere 0
**** you
clockworklolita 3
YDI, dick.
avalanche719 0
YDI but that is ******* hilarious!
arienh4 0
"Today I didn't give a homeless person something, and he chased/assaulted me." Please stop this trend, it's gotta be the fourth time.
iFruit 0
You ass. I've never seen an FML where someone deserved it more. Poor you, you got poked in the leg with a pencil because you wanted to taunt a homeless man, while he is living on the street. Wake up, OP. People are going through things a lot worse than that. I hope you run into him again and get what you deserve.
alphaxzero 0
should have stabbed you in the face
Thereza_fml 0
Nice way to be an assfedora there. YDI, bigtime.
kbaker90 0
Why would you taunt a homeless person? Wtf is wrong with you? YDI you douche.
YoStephy123 0
"Today, some guy taunted me with a dollar. I stabbed him in the leg with a pencil. WIN!" I'll never look at pencils or homeless people the same way.
kbaker90 0
Totally a win for the homeless guy...if I ever see someone treating a person the way the OP did, I'LL stab them with a pencil, if not worse.