Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man on the street and decided to give him the dollar bill I had left in my wallet. He said "Thank you" then as I turned to walk away, he muttered "Cheap-ass cunt". FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML
Today, while I was walking home, a homeless man saw me and didn't ask for change, but how much I charged. FML
Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called his bluff, and walked away. He wasn't bluffing. FML
Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him that I had none, he yelled angrily, "Who comes to this city without money?" I replied, "Apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
Today, I was walking through a rich part of the city and saw 2 dollars on the ground. I didn't pick it so people wouldn't think I was poor. FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
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Top comments
beerab 0
That's just MEAN on your part.
mardigrasqueen 0
You are a pompous bastard. You deserved a knife, not a pencil.
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Comments (813)
athiest_pope 0
asshole
creampie2 3
I saw someone typing this on youtube so this is for you op. Roses are red violettes are blue i have five fingers and the middle ones for you.
tina_xox 0
I suck monster ****.
Chris Garra 5
OK come to the nearest well and jump down you'll land on my monster ****
ShannonBananan76 0
thats wat u get fool
yawneall 0
not an FML but a fail. an epic fail at that.
chaos88 4
total YDI. asshole.
bummerd00de 0
YDI for being a ********. Asshole.
Juuuu_fml 0
We don't have dollar bills in Canada... YDI
wbrycem 0
5, 10, 20, 50 ... those are dollar bills. Assuming, of course, he was waving a bill and not a COIN.
nebjamin69 0
Yeah but a Canadian dollar comes in the form of a coin, which... seem like they'd be pretty hard to actually wave....
sovetskiy 8
a couple decades ago they made 1$ bills. idk when they stopped though
Shenaniganss 0
YDI. How'd you like it if someone waved a million dollars in your face? = And come on, would you really think someone would agree with you and say FYL? Do us a favor and paint yourself yellow and lie in the middle of the road.
RequiemCube 0
But then he could be mistaken for a speed bump and... ohh, I see what you did there.
a_homeless_guy 0
dude, that made me laugh more than the FML, YDI for being a douchebag to us, go die OP
eliz3 0
It's a shame he didn't stab you with something a little sharper.
PaperMoon 0
Karma is a bitch. YDI.