Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML
Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop and I noticed that there was a bug on the guys face in front of me. Trying to be nice I lightly smacked it off. His reaction was to punch me in the face. Repeatedly. FML
Today, I got punched in the face by a girl for asking if she was okay after I had seen her crying. FML
Queue cutters should be prosecuted!
Today, while queuing in a shop, a girl appeared to bunk the line. When I asked her about it, she said it was nothing to do with me. She then asked me what was I going to do about it, before kneeing me in the nuts. I was overtaken by everyone in the queue. FML
Own it!
Today, while standing in line at the store, I thought I could let a small fart slip and blame it on the guy behind me. I did it, then turned to glare at him in disgust, only for him to turn and yell at the crowd, “This bitch farted, not me!” FML
Charming
Today, as I was working in retail, this guy shoved me into the shelves for asking if he needed help with anything, screaming at me that I need to leave him alone. FML
Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant when I heard a young girl telling her father she didn't think she was pretty. When I got up to leave, I walked past her table and told her she was beautiful. Her dad then punched me in the face. FML
Stealth
Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML
Top comments
desireev 18
That's when you say 'I NOW agree with what HE said!!' and point your finger to the guy who insulted her in the first place. FYL
saIty 17
Hmm when you say "socked" do you mean smacked with a sock filled butter and other miscellaneous materials? Or the boring fist to face?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (124)
silentbutfunny 0
Betty white?
TheRealMissFail 4
Socks do tend to hurt.
emilyjgraham 34
why are people saying he deserved this?
bubo_fml 11
Your a gent 4 taking 1 for the team. Use this 2 your advantage for some "Oh, I'm sorry for the misunderstanding" sex!
Nashiq 8
sounds like something that would happen here in atlanta
brainwash 0
I hope you punched her back!
Donniehw 5
"1800-choke that ho" - the dude from madeas big happy family
yaoifreak 8
......OH NOO SHE DIDN'T (snap).......heh
Petertheman 0
I would have ****** her up
dharmaxxx 2
file assault charges, that would **** up her life much worse than a swing back.