Today, while getting it on with my wife, I started to talk dirty to her. She started laughing. When I asked her if she wanted me to stop, she just kept on laughing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML
Today, I decided to call my wife while she was having a private lunch with my parents. I began to tell her all the nasty things I was going to do to her in bed. Halfway through my fantasy, she giggled and told me that she was going to take me off speakerphone. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML
Today, I was about to have sex with my wife, so I walked into our room naked, but then whacked myself in the nuts with the door handle as I attempted to close it. She can't stop laughing, and I can't sit down. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me while I was at work. She did so by telling me she has a yeast infection. FML
Today my girlfriend was on top during sex. I went to slap her butt, missed and nailed myself in the balls. We had to stop. She wouldn't stop laughing. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DGross 8
At least you know she was having fun :-)
lizliz07 0
this isn't a FML. get over it. it's not like this is the first time you guys have slept together. it would suck if you just got married and found out she always giggled during sex!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (92)
piandod 0
OP, this is not an FML. Me and my girlfriend's relationship is practically based on laughter. You just probably aren't very good at talking dirty, and so it sounds funny coming out of your mouth. That's ok, cause I'm no good at it either. My advice? If you can't go for dirty, go for sweet instead, and throw out not-original but better-than-nothing phrases like "I love you", "You're so amazing", and the like. Be creative. And who knows? Perhaps someday you'll find that you can slip in something raunchy without even realizing it. Just relax, and enjoy the woman you've got. She sounds like a decent enough person to take something like that lightheartedly and not get completely bent about it.
tama_tee 0
hahahaha loser hahahaha. ha. ha. sorry. loser.
tama_tee 0
hahahaha loser hahahaha. ha. ha. sorry. loser.
Kenton1008 21
prick..
1234USMC 0
slap her and like "bitch what's so funny don't laugh" and continue with what you wet saying
zombiemaster21 0
many your pubes were tickling her insides
Liamj774 36
Laugh at her when she wants a new article of clothing. Then she'll see how it feels
Harle 24
Reminds me of when I have normal conversations with my boyfriend during sex