Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, I was talking to this boy I really like and we were laughing together, until I got this disgusting putrid smell. I started to say how awful the smell was and he stopped laughing to take a sniff too. As soon as he closed his mouth the smell was gone. FML
Today, I was cuddling with the guy I'm dating and said, "You smell good." His response, "You don't." FML
Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying, "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML
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Top comments
shaar_fml 33
Charming..
DocBastard 40
Q: When will flatulence no longer be funny? A: Never.
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Comments (64)
Soundslikeothers 15
That is love, he is so comfortable around you that he can let a deadly one go at the dinner table.
Jacksparrow72 21
He should at least respect her enough to not fart while she is eating. That's disgusting.
False_Stupidity 42
Yes but sometimes you just can't hold them in until after dinner.
AloysiusWeasley 15
That's when you excuse yourself to the bathroom, or an unoccupied room, or even outside. I can definitely understand OP's disappointment.
candiicane 12
#34 it's just a fart. Sometimes things happen when you least expect, and you can either bolt like a weirdo to the bathroom (and make it all of a step away before it happens) or just let it be. Girls get too uptight about farts, it's a totally normal bodily function. That'd be like saying it's rude to sneeze in public, but no we bless those who do it.
mld4657 28
I can't decide on Ew or good job
blazerman_fml 17
I can help you with that.Its Ewwww.Why the hell would letting a horrible fart out during a romantic meal be a good job?
mld4657 28
op didn't specify a romantic dinner she said they were eating. and looks like she was hoping for romance but got farts instead
blazerman_fml 17
Fart Question: Is it whoever smelt it,who dealt it? Or Whoever denied it,who supplied it? Or whoever did the rhyme was the one who did the crime?
MortenM 17
Don't. just don't
teentee401 37
Farts can be funny, but I have to say dinner is not the time.
bryanjamieluke 17
Was this at home or out in public???
briggsopposed 8
Why does that matter?
bryanjamieluke 17
Because think of the poor people around them!!!
MortenM 17
So you're asking whether is was funny or really funny?
cyzn 18
Well thats cute
worldclassrager 41
Take Beno before and there will Be no gas...
pratikp03 22
Why does every girl except the guy to say that, not other way around? I don't get it :s
a_m_a1893 10
Because usually men are more closed off emotionally and don't make their feelings known as often as women.
MattThePimp 10
Expect the unexpected.
alaen23 23
That musty be a shitty dinner