Today, I got chewed out by a parent for putting her kid underwater. I teach swim lessons. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Little perv
Today, I was teaching swim lessons. I got felt up by a 6 year-old boy. Three times. FML
Today, I had to go take swimming lessons because my mom has a fear I'll drown and I'm totally afraid of swimming anyway and never get anywhere near water. My instructor? A high school classmate of mine. My fellow swimming classmates? 5 and 6 year old kids. FML
Tyranny
Today, while teaching swimming to a bunch of five year-olds, one particularly bratty girl decided she didn't want to swim and led the entire class to strike, leaving the pool empty, and me without a job. Apparently I was teaching the next world tyrant to swim. FML
Today, at my job as a sailing instructor, I had to stop kids from getting their asses sucked by a pool filter. FML
Today, I got a concussion while teaching a kid how to be a safe and cautious swimmer. FML
Teaching moment
Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "But I just peed in that water." FML
Today, I rescued a little boy who looked like he was drowning in a public pool. His mother then smacked me in the face for "touching him". FML
Today, a kid I taught to swim became my new boss, at the pool that I have worked at for nine years. FML
In my day…
Today, we were slowly introducing my daughter to the pool to help her get over her terrible fear of water. My father-in-law scoffed, called us pussies, and tossed my daughter straight into the water. When I threw him out, he insisted he was just trying to teach her to swim "the right way." FML
Today, while taking part in a lifeguarding exercise, I was supposed to "drown" to get another guard to save me. After all was done, my boss called me into his office and screamed at me for "drowning the wrong way," and threatening our reputation. FML
Top comments
Wizardo 34
Sounds like her brain is water logged. Don't hold your breath and dive into the deep end with this one, dangerous and annoying waters.
maggieisbatman 10
Apparently nobody bothered to "tech" you how to spell.
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Comments (86)
Wizardo 34
Sounds like her brain is water logged. Don't hold your breath and dive into the deep end with this one, dangerous and annoying waters.
Jerakl 21
Nice ones Word Wizard!
foxwasalamb 24
how dare OP teach a kid something he might love later on in his life, create a passion for, or become a hobby. just downright shameful.
AmbientFTW 6
Then again if the kid was being a brat the parent was right to consider drowning an option...
IStoleTheCookies 16
Dipping a child under water is part of the lessons. Its literally dipping them under and bringing them back up, so their heads get wet. My nephew had to do it, along with everyone in his swim class, and actually he loved it.
Jerakl 21
You obviously weren't doing your job right! You tech kids how to swim, not sink!
maggieisbatman 10
Apparently nobody bothered to "tech" you how to spell.
ElricMustang 23
Now, now, #6; accidents happen...
VengeanceChicken 12
We can tech him. We have the technology.
jesuismelogee 16
I think it's for helping them overcome the fear of having their head underwater and ultimately not be afraid to swim. I'm sure the instructor, OP, was holding onto them and the parent just panicked, acted protective and acted irrationally towards OP
football98_fml 20
I dont know why number 6 got downvoted, i found what she said pretty funny
isuckwithnames 22
Yeah #2 is a great ecample
AmbientFTW 6
I hate it when I ecample my tent
thatsLEGENDARY 15
It's called drown proofing. But I guess if the parents like drowning that's their own business. Not that I have ever met someone alive who has really experienced it.
AmbientFTW 6
Drown proofing? The kid isn't a Navy SEAL... (For those who don't know, drown proofing is Phase 2 of SEAL training - BUD/S).
trex454 21
its called teaching your child to swim. every now and then while swimming you will go under the water. it doesn't mean your drowning. Idk why he is getting down votes. he was using sarcasm pretty heavily
thatsLEGENDARY 15
#44 I'm sure it is but they also have a process for babies/toddlers. But I mean you go in a pool, expect to get wet! Poor OP!
littlekellilee 45
It's not called drown proofing. It's called going underwater, and a kid has to do it 3 times in a set of lessons to pass. If you really want to make lessons sound epic, call swimming lessons in general "down proofing".
yawhat 5
my daughter has been doing swimming lessons since she was 5 months old, and has been dunked under the water since then. it helps to teach them to hold their breath. although it's normally the parent swimming with the child unless they are older or do private lessons I guess.
Ilsimen 2
It amazes me how many people failed to sense your sarcasm...
pete9913 23
I saw your sarcasm #2, even if no one else did.
orbit 22
It's okay #39, you tried.
Jerakl 21
#13, #6, I'm a tech head so I often misspell "teach" when on a mobile device because of the amount of times I type out "tech". Good one #13.
Olliebob1619 13
Some people are just totally irrational. I hope you didn't get in any trouble.
goose12321 11
I would've said stupid.
VengeanceChicken 12
Honestly, what else could she have expected from a swim instructor? It's not like you're gonna purposely drown the kid, sheesh.
who_else00 12
Why was the kid underwater in the first place I dont't know why you put them there unless you were teaching him how to dive and swim underwater
1two3four5six 23
how are you supposed to swim without being underwater?
jerryj 27
One word: Jesus
mackdeezy 22
Chuck Norris can swim on land
AmbientFTW 6
Umm...I'm pretty sure you can swim with your head above water...you know...
fsomelife 26
42, That's not really swimming, it's paddling... if you want maxium speed and energy conservation, you're gonna have to get your face under the surface one way or another.
ItsATwinThing 9
When I was about 4 I started swimming lessons. My mum said I use to swim backstroke with my head under the water and smiling. I remember them telling us to put our heads under the water and come back up. I was always under the water, just because I liked it. You have to put your head in the water at some point...just not backstroke! :P
Thatguy334 7
#50, the usmc would beg to differ. There are many varieties of swimming techniques that do not require the head to go underwater
The_4th_Doctor 13
Seriously..? Did you read the FML? OP is a swim instructor. Usually, you need to be able to go underwater 3 times to pass, and just hold your breath in general.
WordAficionada 19
I think it depends how old the child was? Maybe your teaching method is just something she's never experienced before! But it's not like you forced the child underwater, you probably just made them dip there head underneath and tried making them swim that way. Parents are crazy protective of their children, understandably! Don't worry OP, keep doing your job!
nesteremily 31
People are idiots. If I were you I wouldn't give her child swim lessons anymore
abbii_7 8
YDI, you teach swim lessons. not sink lessons
VengeanceChicken 12
Going under is part of the program. You know, because your face is going to be submerged half the time.
fsomelife 26
Pretty sure one needs to understand how to behave whilst submerged in order to NOT sink. Which brings us back to swimming.
JBChristian 47
#12, can you stop telling OP how to do their job? I'm sure you don't do swim lessons.
xmaan667 15
If she didn't want her kid in water then she shouldn't have signed him/her up for swimming lessons. FYL for doing ur job op.
badluckalex 23
da stoopidity uf sum peeple ai sware...
dreamweaver1227 11
lurn fukin inglish u unkulterd swyne.
badluckalex 23
It was a joke... a very bad one I guess. :/
teotsi 28
Dolan jokes have never been funny.
MattThePimp 10
SWEG FER LIEF