Today, while at work, I got a call. They left a voicemail. It was a 7 minute voicemail of the mattress squeaking and my mom screaming my dad's name. I am going to their house for supper tonight. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to "Listen to this voicemail." I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty, followed by the bed springs bouncing for three minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML
Today, after making love to my girlfriend, I realised that the phone was on the bed and because of the movements, it called my dad by itself. It went to voicemail. My dad will soon have all the details. FML
Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML
Today, my father got married. He left me a voicemail to tell me all about it. FML
Today, I was making love with my girlfriend and my landline rang. Obviously, I let it go to voicemail. At the very moment I was about to cum, I heard my mum's voice on my voicemail: "Hi sweetheart!" FML
Today, I woke up at 1:39 a.m. to my dad's phone going off, only to hear my parents having sex. It's now 2:12 a.m. and I can still hear them going at it. FML
Today, I went on a date, and halfway through I started getting nonstop calls from “Mom” on my phone. Annoyed, I silenced them. Later, I checked my voicemail. It was actually my mom calling from the ER because she had slipped and broken her ankle. FML
Today, my parents left for work before I had to leave for school and I decided to skip. I stayed by the phone, expecting the school to call so I could pose as my parent and excuse my absence. The phone rings and I pick up. It's my Mom, calling to leave my dad a message on the machine. FML
Today, I listened to a voicemail from my mom about how she misses me and can't wait to see me when I get back from vacation. Thinking she hung up, my mother then had a conversation with my aunt about how quiet the house is without me and how she'd be blessed if I didn't come home. FML
Today, I received a message from front desk that my concerned father is trying to contact me. I call only to hear that my parents were freaking out that I wasn't answering my phone. They saw me 9 hours ago. They were going to call the police. I'm in college and also don't live with them anymore. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
bigphill1333 0
Well I guess your moms a screamer and your dad has skills.
angel55033 12
play it back for them lol but WTF why did you listen to all 7 minutes that's just wrong
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (149)
Gorsbug823 0
ydi for saying supper
Fall3nAngel 23
Uh, why would they even... How did they even manage... How and when did they decide they were going to..????
cathyran25 0
yes but u chose 2 listen 2 it all u could have chose not 2 after a few seconds ;)...... MASTURBATION :P
DrummerBoy21 0
If you have a Boyfriend/Girlfriend... get Revenge ;)
Jersey_love 0
I'm surprised I haven't gotten one of those voice mails from my folks yet. That's one reasoni haven't gone to Fl to visit them in 4 yrs.
capilot 10
This isn't an FML, this is awesome. Your parents have still got it going on. Which is good new for you for when you're their age. An FML would have been if she'd been screaming someone else's name.
everlife_333 3
eww I would hate to be you
Jamesssy 0
I wonder why you didn't stop listening at 6 minutes...
momo1972 3
go dad, knock the dust off that stuff.
rickst3r 0
there's your icebreaker.