Today, while all the other marines got to fly around the island on a helicopter, I got stuck on gear guard. What was I guarding? The staff sergeant's parking spot. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, one of my junior marines called to tell me they were in an accident that totaled both cars. The car he hit was parked in a nearby parking garage. It was mine. FML
Today, I had to pull guard duty. I had to guard the latrine because somebody likes to stuff whole toilet paper rolls in the toilet to clog it. Only six more months in Iraq. FML
Today, I was posted with a very lonely gate-guard. From the second I arrived, I had to listen to him drone on and on, and now I know his entire life story. I was there for four hours. FML
Today, I woke up and I'm still in the Marine Corps. FML
Let me out!
Today, I parked my car in the company lot and walked down the street to a mandatory company training. While I was at the training, everyone back at the office decided to leave early and locked the company lot. My car is now stuck there for the night and I'm walking home. FML
Today, I got my posting orders for the Air Force. After spending four years training and studying to become an aerospace engineer, I am getting sent to the only base without aircraft. FML
Today, my car was stolen from the parking garage, the same one I work at as a security guard. FML
More responsibilities please!
Today, at my job as a supermarket manager, I had to break up a fight over a handicapped parking spot, in which an elderly man nearly got beaten over the head with a prosthetic leg. This wasn't what I expected when I was told I'd been promoted. FML
Today, my father picked me up from the police academy I'm attending, and got caught speeding. The officer was my drill instructor, and I had to do push-ups on the side of the highway. FML
You're in the army now, oh ohoh, you're in the army. Now.
Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML
Top comments
MagicMushrooms 0
RAMIERZ!!! GUARD MY PARKING SPOT!
mfmylifesrsly 30
I love military men :)
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Comments (319)
saint556 4
your prolly a boot and a pog, therefore you should shut your mouth that's the way the marine corps works.
rogerusmc23 0
eat a dick
ILoveTabz 0
ouch!
titmouselax 1
maybe it's because you spend your time on FML and not doing kick ass marine shit, poser
FYLimhoYDI 0
you are both ******* idiots. I hope that someday you need a "boot" and not one ******* "boot" shows up to save you! people like you deserve to be sent to a country that has no military that has to live in fear everyday instead of living in one that gives you the freedom to breath our free air! go **** yourselves!
redrock350 0
My question is, what did you do to **** up devildog?
rogerusmc23 0
i posted this. idk why it says anonymous. i got njpd so they are giving me all the stupid bullshit.
Cris_dell 0
ur cute in uniform. ;)
vee3531 0
then that's your own fault Dev..... quit cryin and face the music... you ****** up, be a man about it....
beeffyboy 0
dude that sux.
jacie00 4
Storm the parking lot in full gear, war paint and all!
watertight 0
suck it up private
rogerusmc23 0
its actually lance corporal.
Fingers0689 0
Must have ****** up
joshhodel2011 0
listen here devil dog you will have your day to shine!!