Today, while all the other marines got to fly around the island on a helicopter, I got stuck on gear guard. What was I guarding? The staff sergeant's parking spot. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, one of my junior marines called to tell me they were in an accident that totaled both cars. The car he hit was parked in a nearby parking garage. It was mine. FML
Today, I had to pull guard duty. I had to guard the latrine because somebody likes to stuff whole toilet paper rolls in the toilet to clog it. Only six more months in Iraq. FML
Today, I was posted with a very lonely gate-guard. From the second I arrived, I had to listen to him drone on and on, and now I know his entire life story. I was there for four hours. FML
Today, I woke up and I'm still in the Marine Corps. FML
Today, I parked my car in the company lot and walked down the street to a mandatory company training. While I was at the training, everyone back at the office decided to leave early and locked the company lot. My car is now stuck there for the night and I'm walking home. FML
Today, I got my posting orders for the Air Force. After spending four years training and studying to become an aerospace engineer, I am getting sent to the only base without aircraft. FML
Today, my car was stolen from the parking garage, the same one I work at as a security guard. FML
Today, at my job as a supermarket manager, I had to break up a fight over a handicapped parking spot, in which an elderly man nearly got beaten over the head with a prosthetic leg. This wasn't what I expected when I was told I'd been promoted. FML
Today, my father picked me up from the police academy I'm attending, and got caught speeding. The officer was my drill instructor, and I had to do push-ups on the side of the highway. FML
Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML
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Top comments
MagicMushrooms 0
RAMIERZ!!! GUARD MY PARKING SPOT!
mfmylifesrsly 30
I love military men :)
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Comments (319)
2141_MECH 0
hoorah Marine Corps
2141_MECH 0
let me guess 03, haha thats Wat you get
kei1108 13
Thanks for serving the country!
keogmama 3
Who did you loss off?
Negrodamus666 0
My SSGT HATED me with a passion because I had the balls to correct him when he mispronounced my last name one time, and he would specifically request me for shit jobs like that on a daily basis. It may suck now, but trust me, one day you'll look back on those times as the best days of your life. And suck it up your a Marine!!! Semper Fi devil dog!
bucky_369 7
it's ok devil, it happens to us all.
aznmex21 3
gotta start somewhere marine....
outsidehitter7 9
LMFAO!!! u sir have just been owned.
Nguyenydapooh 5
You want me to get you a straw? So you can suck it the F*** up Marine?
eradonnes 0
u better guard the mother ******* shit outa that car!!!oorah.