Today, when I woke up, my husband was already up. Thinking I'd heard him in the hall, I yelled out, "Come on, don't be shy, bring your dick back in here right now!" A voice then replied, "He's gone out to get some bread." It was my mother-in-law. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
Today, after my husband told me he doesn't enjoy having sex unless he initiates it, my mother-in-law barged into my bedroom only to find me pleasing myself. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, I got out of bed and went downstairs in my boxers to get a glass of water. I entered the kitchen and said hi to my visiting mother-in-law, who smiled. Only after a good ten minutes did she decide to tell me that my knob was hanging from a gap in my boxers. FML
Today, my mom visited. While she was using the bathroom, my man-child of a husband thought it would be funny to knock on the bathroom door with his penis, thinking it was me in there. She opened the door to find him standing there doing the "helicopter". FML
Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML
Today, my husband got out of the shower, came downstairs naked screaming ''EMBRACE THE HARDNESS!!'' Little did he know, my step mother was sitting right there at the kitchen table. FML
Today, my mom came in my bedroom without knocking, even though I'd told her to, and caught me masturbating. She stood there in awkward silence before saying, "…Dinner's ready at 6." and left. FML
Today, my husband and I were getting busy on the living room couch when my mother-in-law stopped by and let herself in with a key we didn’t know she had. She then demanded an apology like it was all our fault and stormed out. I still don’t know why she came by. FML
Today, I woke up and called my boyfriend. We had amazing phone sex, even better because no one was home and we didn't have to be quiet. Afterwards, I walk out into the kitchen. My mum hadn't gone to work that morning. FML
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Top comments
Root123 0
The mother took it well I'd say.
Rilan 0
Oh my god thats horrible--I'd die!
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Comments (57)
Dark_Angel003 0
Face Palm
stabbed1ntheback 0
She should understand
ThatLooksSticky 16
Yikes! How did she get in your house?
Kiirst_mt1994 26
awkward silence...
thedeadmen 14
Hi can i have ur mail
internetRAT 1
She beat you to it. Incest is real.
LianLover 0
Omg that's hilarious But really that wasn't the smartest thing to do
SpicyDuck 22
What makes it funny I think is the bad dirty talk
Albarufus 13
Don't be embarrassed, being horny, especially in the morning is a natural thing. :D
xNephilim 19
Maybe she's , you know, VISITING?
israelnotjacob 20
This is still one of the best FMLs of all time IMO.