Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sitting next to my friend as he blew out the candles on his birthday cake. Some asshole got the bright idea to shove his face in the cake, but they missed and pushed me in instead. The candles were still lit. My hair caught fire. FML
Today, I celebrated my birthday with a few friends at home. As I bent down over my cake, my friend pushed my face into it. The baker should've told me she put a stick in it to support the cake. FML
Today, I celebrated my friend's birthday. While everyone was completely wasted, a couple of friends suggested that I throw a pie in the birthday boy's face. Only seconds after doing so did I realize that the centre of the pie had still been burning hot when he screamed in agony. FML
Today, it was my birthday. But instead of a decent surprise, my friends decided to smash a cake on my face and unhook my dress, while taking a video of it. In a public shopping mall. FML
Today, it was my boyfriend's 24th birthday. His friends were throwing him a surprise party and I was in charge of getting his birthday cake. As a joke, I got it in the shape of a penis, with a graphic marzipan design. Funny, I never knew his overly-conservative parents were invited. FML
Today, my husband blew all the candles on his birthday cake while I was taking a photo in front of him. I will probably never use cocoa powder to decorate a birthday cake anymore. FML
Today, it's my birthday and I was very happy. When the moment came to blow the candles, all of the decoration on the cake flew off. It had taken an hour to make and set them on the cake. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML
Today, my friend told the cute waiter it was my birthday. He brought out a dessert with a candle and put a huge sombrero on my head. Everyone at the restaurant started singing me happy birthday. I got embarrassed and put my head down. My sombrero caught on fire. FML
Today, I finally got to surprise my boyfriend with a birthday cake. I spent four days planning the perfect one. First thing he says? "Erm, you know I'm 32, right?" I got his age wrong. FML
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Top comments
LiznessMonster 9
(Boyfriend's Log, Entry No. 224) |Homicide Attempt 1 = Failure, will try again tomorrow.| "Honey what's that?" "Um....nothing."
k3rslc 0
OUCH, how smart of him. Hope you didn't have burns. :S Btw. Was the cake good anyway? Happy Birthday. LOL.
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Comments (92)
LiznessMonster 9
(Boyfriend's Log, Entry No. 224) |Homicide Attempt 1 = Failure, will try again tomorrow.| "Honey what's that?" "Um....nothing."
KrazieKleo 13
Added to favorite lol!!! Funny guy hahaha.
blackwidowtaco 31
How the hell is this even remotely funny?
felixshen 18
ydi for going out with an absolute genius with a brain that rivals albert einstein's jk but seriously, dont go out with axholes
blackwidowtaco 31
Or guys who can't even spell simple cuss words, for that matter.
TropicalTulipz 0
dammm that sux really
Hopersz 0
What an is. Stupidity is like a disease. I would have told him that and said get well soon bitch and dumped him on the SPOT
orly33 0
You got burnt.
SpRiTzSpLaSh 7
Dumbass? Lmao
ulicksam 0
YDI for dating a moron.
cookie_wookie 0
Fail much?
nerwende_fml 0
Ouch, ouch, OUCH!!! :/ Please tell me you've dumped him.