Today, we had my grandmother with dementia round for tea. She looked me up and down and said, very matter-of-factly, "Well, with a figure like that, no one will rape you." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, we spent the day with my grandmother. During a family conversation, my sweet little grandmother looked me up and down, and without any hesitation said, "I remember you being so beautiful," before looking at my mother, mouthing, "What happened?" and laughing. She's 87. FML
Today, I visited my grandmother who has dementia. She thought I was my father, and told me that I should never have married my mother, let alone have had children with her. FML
Today, my grandmother saw me for the first time in years. "Not all your clothes have to be as tight as condoms, you tramp," is probably the nicest greeting she's ever given me. FML
Let her have her fun
Today, I was at a restaurant with my grandma. A young, ripped gentleman suddenly walked through the door and my grandma looked at him and shouted, "Look! Eye candy!" as loud as she could. He heard it and was extremely embarrassed. To make it worse, my grandma is a widow, so she might have actually meant it. FML
Today, I was eating lunch when my grandmother came over and started watching me. Suddenly she said, "I see you're getting breasts". I'm a guy. FML
Today, I went to see my grandmother. She has Alzheimer's and doesn't remember me sometimes, and today she thought I was her sister and that I was trying to steal my grandfather from her. She hit me with a cane and called me a slut. FML
Today, my grandmother said to me, "You look just like your mother did at your age. Except you're fatter of course." FML
Today, I asked my grandmother what she looked like when she was young. She casually replied, "I was ugly, sweetie. Just like you." FML
Faint praise
Today, we had a group of friends over, as well as my grandma. She started talking about me when I was a kid, when I suddenly heard her saying, "Well, yeah, she wasn’t a beautiful child, not at all, she looked.… OK." FML
Today, I went to the gym with my grandma. In the span of an hour, she was hit on more than I ever have been in my life. FML
Top comments
haileyrows 26
Unfortunately, that's not necessarily true because most rapists are after a feeling of power, not a gratifying sexual experience. But I suppose if Grandma is going to insult you at least she tried to put a positive spin on it!
WCARlover 35
Grandmas say the darnedest things
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Comments (65)
acmariner99 25
That's demented
EliGolsdworthy 7
She's not all there still sorry that was said to you
writerchic85 26
So you'll never have that rape ready body. Doesn't mean you yourself can't become the rapist. Start with your grandma. To establish dominance.
J352SAURUS 30
What the ****.
jackler92 16
That's a double edged sword no rapists but no one you want wither
sillygirl247 14
Well at least you're not getting raped..
trumpy 9
yea...cuz everyone wants a body that attracts rapists *enter severe sarcasm* also if im not mistaken...all kinds of ppl are abused not just skinny or attractive ppl since its about control not sexuality
EiraHaexa 2
Try not to take it personally. I work in dementia care and most of them haven't the slightest clue what they're saying.
17_love 10
Author of this FML. Don't listen to anybody saying those mean things. They are just haters. Your amazing and beautiful in your own way and know one has to know but you for it to be true
NYGiants1925 22
Oh shit. I was not expecting it to go there.
WAKingUP91 11
there's noooooooooo possible way to comfort this. you can either 1. pretty much call yourself a rapist. or 2. call her ugly. . . . I'm gonna go back to being a dick. suck it up. your grandmother's probably blind anyway. you got good ****. . . maybe.
Miss_Whipped 43
Did you even take the time to consider what you were typing before you started projectile-vomiting nonsensical bullshit in the middle of this comment thread? And yes, I'll be the asshole to say it. Read the post completely before commenting.