Today, we found out why we were getting notes on our door telling us to "move out or else." As my mom works for the government and we have a direct-TV dish on our roof, our neighbor thinks we were sent to listen to his phone calls and read his mind. We were here before he was. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got home from work to find an eviction notice taped to my door, stating that I was a nuisance and had 30 days to vacate the property. I live at home with my parents. FML
Today, I awoke to banging at my door. It was my neighbor, accusing me of stealing her mail to spy on her, because apparently she thinks I must be some sort of secret agent. The cops don't believe me when I call, and she won't go away. FML
Today, I found out that I bought a house next door to crazy people. She asked me if I would mind not showering when her husband is at home, because he can hear me and knowing I’m naked on the other side of the wall turns him on, which is a nuisance for her. He’s unemployed. He’s always at home, the creep. FML
Today, I was singing while unloading my dishwasher. I heard a knock on the door and went to answer it only to find the police telling me they received noise complaints from my neighbors. I live next-door to my parents. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML
Today, my mom realized that the "door" part in "screen door" doesn't block sound when she began to talk to our neighbours about how much of a failure I am. I heard everything. FML
Today, I found out that my mother has been telling several people that my fiancé and I will be moving into her house for the foreseeable future. All because we're moving to a city close by for jobs and are still searching for housing. I found this out from several of the people she told. FML
Today, I came home to a noise complaint letter taped to my apartment door. I haven't been home in over a month. FML
Today, my neighbor knocked on my door and left a note that said "Please stop singing in the shower. You're terrible, and everyone in the building can hear you." FML
Today, management told me that I couldn't have a doorbell on my door. How did they get my attention to tell me this? By ringing my doorbell. FML
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Top comments
ariannaimelda 7
He knows too much. Dispose of him quickly.
elboon 0
Crazy guy. Go along with it just for the hell of it. :P
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Comments (169)
cocomymoco 0
can you say... paranoid???
newgirl009 7
You'll probably come home one night to find that he's completely wrapped himself in tinfoil and huddling in the corner of your yard after an attempt at getting your satellite dish down.
macdaddymady 8
he should read the constitution
Zaffro 8
So many idiots in this world, how much does it cost for a length of rope?!
almira_fml 5
may be he has developed schizophrenia...
Jojo1978 0
Time for an involuntary mental exam by the sound of things....
SteelCladAngel 0
tell him you'll have 'them' take him away if he doesn't stop leaving the notes, and that you know it's him because your 'they' watch your house through the satellites and beam the video/image feed to a chip in your brain.... :)
perdix 31
Tell him he doesn't have to waste his time writing the threatening notes -- your mind-reading gizmo is picking up his anger and discomfort loud and clear. Then, tell him that your machine is also picking up dirty thoughts about children and you can turn this data over to the FBI. That'll shut him up.
OfficeNinja 5
awesome. get him on hidden camera posting the threat, then turn it over to the police or FBI. you can't just post "terrorist threats" on doors anymore. and hope he is not a bat shit crazy tea party guy with a room full of guns. not that all tea party people are crazy - many are not. but the crazy ones with guns tend to be more likely to post threats on doors.
cimh 9
Give him some tin foil and tell him to put it around his head!