Today, there was a guy following me, so to avoid him, I crouched down and basically waddled behind a wall to get past him. Sure enough, first thing I see when I get around the corner, while still waddling, was an unhappy midget couple staring right at me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML
Freaked
Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML
Today, I was chased on my bike by a couple of guys in a car. I rode into a public park to cut through and try to lose them. I looked by to check if they were following me, but they had to stop. I laughed, looked forward, and rammed into a little girl. FML
Avoidance issues
Today, as I was walking home, I noticed a man and a woman arguing in their driveway. To avoid an awkward situation, I crossed the street. I then had to walk past a creepy guy watering his plants in his underwear while looking directly at me. FML
Today, while walking home after a night of partying, I saw a thin, bald person in a suit looking at me from across the street. I got flashbacks to the Slender Man, screamed like a little bitch and ran. Then I realized I'd just humiliated myself in front of some random guy waiting for a bus. FML
Close shave
Today, as I was taking a walk, I heard a cyclist and so I wanted to move to the other side of the sidewalk for them. It turns out that I walked directly in front of them instead. Nearly scared them to death. FML
Today, as I was coming out of the ladies' room, I saw a guy glancing at me. A few minutes later, I saw him coming at me at a fast rate. I decided to run from him. As I got out of the building and into a cab, I saw him from the window waving my phone at me. He was just trying to return it. FML
Today, a guy who annoys me walked over. To avoid speaking to him, I pretended to be on the phone and he walked away. A few moments later, my phone rang. I looked around to see if he'd seen me. He had. He was the one calling me from down the hall. FML
That Netflix show
Today, I was getting catcalled downtown by a guy I've never seen before. Then he told me he knows where I live, and accurately described my apartment while he followed me for 2 blocks. FML
Today, I went out to go meet up with a guy. I walked all the way to his house just to see him. Then he made me hide behind a bush till his girlfriend left. FML
Top comments
yamatelle 19
As I read through this, I was expecting the stalker to wait for you around the corner. The midgets were completely unexpected.
LardZilla 11
Wow, that's just some bad luck.
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Comments (102)
wegetrz 14
Kinda weird for a guy to hide behind a wall cuz hes a-scared the wittle guy fowowing him is gonna steal his lunch money or somethin...ydi for waddling who does that when there's always a chance WHATEVER u do WILL offend someone!hahaha
Mornai 32
Well, the man could have looked like a kind of guy who's scouting out potential targets to rob at gunpoint.
hoonyer 17
akward, just waddle away
Lanceeden 12
true.
MaddyHatter 8
29 just won.
blackprince2012 9
Sounds lik somthin u would c on a movie lmao
Jasonf6 0
#1, they aren't midgets so you just DIY again.
HomeAl0ne 20
Awesome luck, now you can stay down low and blend into the crowd. It would have been much harder if you'd run into the Harlem Globetrotters.
jessesgirl14 16
Wow! This is the first FML that actually made me laugh!!! Good job OP! Lmfao!!
mrbaka 4
So...someone was following you but you managed to get past him by going behind a wall .....how did u manage that if he's behind you..
mrbaka 4
Guess the trolls weren't getting any customers at the bridge so they decided to hide behind the wall.
lexi365 20
Tucker Max!!!
sensfan7 3
Sup babe