Today, the pictures from last night's party were put on Facebook. The pictures that show me getting in a drunken fight with a girl and her putting my face through the wall. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I posted on my Facebook wall that I'd gotten into a huge bar fight and had the shit kicked out of me, all to avoid having to tell the truth, namely that I'd stayed home all night because nobody invited me out to party. FML
Today, my friends showed me a video of me blind drunk last night, getting into a fight with my front door. The door won, unlike my face. FML
Today, I sent a Facebook friend request to the guy who had the party I was at last night. I immediately realized, however, that my new profile picture is of me, smiling and holding the trophy I stole from his house. FML
Today, I got fired from my job. My manager found Facebook pictures of me drinking underage at a party. He said he didn't want "that kind of image" associated with the business. It was his birthday party. He supplied the booze. FML
Today, my recent ex-girlfriend posted a photo of herself on Facebook. It was a picture of herself in the arms of a half-naked male stripper. She posted it on my wall. FML
Today, I woke up in hospital after a night of heavy drinking. My friends told me I was beat up by the doorman. After going to the club to watch the security footage, it was revealed I actually fell on my face trying to fight, and caused more damage to myself. FML
Today, I blacked out going up a roller coaster. Instead of helping me, my friend took pictures of my face and posted them on Facebook. FML
Today, I woke up with my face covered in blood. Turns out that yesterday at my colleague's birthday party, I got so drunk that I started yelling "Nappy time!" before falling out of my hammock and face-first onto the concrete ground. FML
Today, I checked my Facebook to find I had been tagged in a bunch of photos from a party I had attended last night. On each picture I had a comment from my mom saying, "You're grounded." FML
Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML
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Top comments
ThankYhuCaptinOb 0
It says you are a man. You deserve it for 1. Getting Drunk 2. Fighting a GIRL and 2. For thinking you could win. Just playing. But really , never underestimate a girl. :)
reyemrein 0
Sorry to be a counting Nazi, but you said two twice.
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Comments (142)
janise 2
FYourLife? Yeah right. Sounds to me like what really happened is you were being a belligerent drunk and picked a fight with a girl. You then proceeded to get your ass handed to you and now you want sympathy.
airforce987 20
ydi for getting beaten up by a girl. especially while drunk!
afatmonkey 0
I take it you've never seen Rosie O'Donald? She is a big woman. She could do some damage to anyone. At least, I think she's a woman. Now that I think about it, she probably isn't.
crisco_jockey 0
the only things rosie o'donnel could do damage to are a buffet table and a diatritan's confidence.
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Not true, #110. If she falls on someone, all that weight can do a lot of damage. XD
afatmonkey 0
And you can't shoot her. 49 inches of body fat works better than Kevlar.
angrynegro7 16
Rosie O'Donald wears underwear with dickholes in 'em!
KurouTenshi 0
it's safe to assume you aren't a master of the drunken fist style... it's okay :) I'm still working on drunken swordsman <.<
MadaZer0 8
Don't cut yourself~
majones 0
I'm a master of drunken flamethrower.
demoon_fml 7
@tenshi-gonna get cut bitch.
demoon_fml 7
I am the master of drunken bow and arrow. I fire a few into a crowd and I never miss!
MadaZer0 8
I am the master of orgasms~ Everyone female I touch will instantly squirt from their cooch'. Magic fingers~
Thunderbender 2
That sucks :(. Well I guess its a good thing you'll never touch a female then :)
ReDsKiNsMaN 0
yeah I got the drunk sniping down
TattedDownJah 2
were can I see those pictures at
lovelyred 0
You must be proud. (:
Menick47 0
Dude! I think I saw that! You were sooo owned! Hey mabey next time you guys could fight sober to see who would win.
CallMeHush 1
The chick would still kick his asssssd.
Sarah803 0
YDI! 1) never fight a girl we kick ass whe we get pissed 2) don't party and expect there not to be pictures of it 3) people who get drunk only end up in trouble. Have fun being embarresed you jerk
angrynegro7 16
Sorry, but this is just sad. There's no upside to this FML. Win, lose, or draw, you got drunk and picked a fight with a woman! Your mother must be so proud! :P
Foxracingluver 0
I love a person named a name...(if ur out there u know who u r):)
_great_ 0
I would like to see those haha. P.S u need a warning label.