Today, the person I was seeing asked to be just friends. A few hours later, they tried to talk me into having sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I drove 4 hours to see my girlfriend of a year, as she had asked me to stay with her for a few days. When I arrived she told me she wanted to be friends as she liked someone else, but wanted me to stay the few days so we could work on being friends. FML
Today, I proposed. She immediately said no and then broke up with me. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said she wanted to stay just friends. Not only did I get denied, apparently we're also "just friends." FML
Today, my ex, who has been asking me to get back with her, told me that she doesn't want to be in a relationship with me when I asked. FML
Today, I finally got to spend a good amount of time with this girl I had been trying to get with for weeks, only to realize I wasn't that into her. I asked my friend for help and he proceeded to literally drag me away from her, while I pretended to try and stop him. FML
Today, the guy I've been seeing told me he did not want to pursue a relationship with me after over two months of talking. He did the exact same thing to me seven years ago. I fell for him twice. FML
Today, a guy I've been dating for a year asked me to meet him for dinner and a couple of drinks. After dinner, he confessed that he's been seeing another woman and has decided he wants to seek a relationship with her. He then told me how sex with me is great, but he didn't want me to continue being "the other woman." FML
Today, the previously charming guy I've been seeing for the past two weeks tried to introduce a weekly sex quota into our relationship. FML
Today, I asked out this girl I've been spending a lot of time with lately. She told me she was only hanging out with me because she thought I was gay and wouldn't try to get in her pants. FML
Today, I got turned down by the person who has been wanting to date me for five months. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Tripartita 45
"As much as I appreciate the offer, would you mind doing it yourself? You know, like, go **** yourself."
vicfirthfan 11
that's when you calmly explain to them that you're just friends now. Do it with a smile so it's insulting, since they insulted you with that bs
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (42)
2013bchan41 20
Well you can be friends with benefits then ;)
Tripartita 45
I hope they cover dental.
BiGTiMeNeRD 29
No, definitely oral though.
Cow_Girl_Lilly 24
You can find someone better OP!! Someone who won't want you for sex... Unless that's what you want.
Qandol 26
Seriously? maybe you should reread the FML again.
MamaChey 24
Thank you, Dr. Phil
vicfirthfan 11
that's when you calmly explain to them that you're just friends now. Do it with a smile so it's insulting, since they insulted you with that bs
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
And if you want to rub extra salt into the wound, you ask him to set you up with his good-looking friend since that's what friends do for each other.
Tripartita 45
"As much as I appreciate the offer, would you mind doing it yourself? You know, like, go **** yourself."
Rarepepes 4
They?
Mynxie 26
The OP does not wish to identify the gender of the ex or of themself. In the case, they is used as a singular, instead of plural.
Tripartita 45
No. If you find such a simple thing "confusing and stupid", I think you're in need of the mental workout. No pain, no gain.
Rarepepes 4
I meant they as in there were multiple people asking OP
trollcrusher 17
@31 Everybody knows what you meant, and that's why you're getting flak for it. Taken in context, the form of "they" being used was crystal clear.
RichardPencil 32
All the sex, none of the commitment. Nice work if you can get it.
polsen4273 8
Sounds like a good deal.
TheyCallMeDamien 18
You dodged a bullet. Be thankful.
Darkreign333 23
I hope you said no because you didn't want to ruin the friendship.
TheAprilWitch 22
Great response
tibtak_fml 10
"THEY tried to talk me into having sex"?!?
trollcrusher 17
Yeah... you know, "they", a common pronoun used to refer to a person of unspecified sex?
DataWog 30
English is such a frustrating language when it comes to unspecified genders.
kalebaby 9
I mean at least your not with him anymore seems like a douche
Zebediabolical 45
OP used "the person I was seeing" and 'they". OP also has a username of "genderless". So we can't assume it's a 'him'.