Today, someone threw an open soda can at me from a car. It missed, so they circled around and threw an unopened can. That one hit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I accidentally kicked a can and it hit a man's shoe. He tried to kick it at me but his foot somehow failed to connect with the can. I could hear it rattling behind me as he failed again and again. So he decided to run up behind me and throw it at my head. FML
Today, I got rear-ended. An old woman got out and came over to my car window. I thought she was coming to apologize and trade insurance companies. Instead, she poured her soda on my head, ran back into her car, and drove away. FML
Today, one of my co-workers threw a piece of garbage at the waste bin beside me. When it missed, he said, "Aw, I missed the garbage... and the bin beside it." FML
Today, trying to look cool, I threw my coke bottle in the air, and tried to catch it with one hand. I missed and it fell to the floor. Luckily, it wasn't open, but in my unimaginable stupidity, I opened it less than five seconds later. FML
Today, some unprovoked drunk asshole tried punching a hole through the windshield of my car. While I was driving it. FML
Today, as a prank I shook my girlfriend's can of soda. I hadn't noticed that it was already open. FML
Today, while working at a restaurant, I watched someone throw their car door open and hit the side of my brand new car for the third time this week. I told the woman to be more careful. She told my manager that I was being racist. As I was being yelled at, I watched her hit my car again, smiling. FML
Today, I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. As I did, a car that was passing by stopped, made a U-turn, and then came back so the people inside could laugh at me. When they were done taunting me, they made another U-turn and continued back in their original direction. FML
Today, a private number called me telling me to "Beware the water bottles" as soon as a water bottle flew through my open window, hitting me. FML
Today, a lady threw a coke bottle at my head because she had a non-winning lottery ticket. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Were these people high on Coke? I'm sure this gave you a Jolt, but in Sprite of your ordeal, don't keep Tabs on these people - they could be dangerous criminals. You need to try to stay 5-Alive. I would take a Minute Maid and then get out of town. Maybe take a walk through some Mountain Dew and breathe some Sierra Mist, or take a trip to a Sunkist Orangina grove, or go visit your Crush. I hope my advice Pepsis you up a bit. Good luck.
TheCarChanel 0
Did u grab the unopened one
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Comments (126)
KM96 24
What the hell?! Who does that?!
DarkHelmet 10
If you saw them circling around that didn't raise a few alarms for you pimpjuice. A little voice in your head didn't speak up and say "oh shit their coming back for more"
bethcox 4
Why didn't you just run off.. you would have remained dry and it would have pissed them off.. everybody wins!
OkitaCockroach 19
Dafuq you do? FYL, OP. unless you did something to deserve a can to the head xD
ICastillo 25
That's messed up man, some people are ass holes.
kevinn95 0
How is free soda a FML?
TwiztedYuri 9
and that is why smart people don't yell missed me.
BeThePanda 1
Where exactly does OP say that he/she yelled anything? It just says that they missed. Read the FML before you comment.
xgetxbentx 13
At least you got a free soda?
BlueOysterCult87 13
Agreed. That's the first thing I thought of too. You might want to wait a few minutes before opening it though.
Valdrek 26
I hate what the word is becoming
lixone 7
What word? Oh, you must mean world.
linkinpark98 24
What word? Bird?........ Well, EVERYBODY'S HEARD ABOUT THE BIRD! A WELL A BIRD BIRD BIRD, B-B-BIRD IS THE WORD!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
DONT YOU KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD??
BlueOysterCult87 13
Haven't you heard?????
jojimugo 20
Dodge, Dip, Duck, Dive, and Dodge