Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Mystery man
Today, as I was taking my three year-old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML
Today, a woman came up to me and sheepishly asked if my son is single. He's not my son, he's my boyfriend. FML
Today, my now ex-fiancée confessed that "our" child is most likely actually hers and my father's. FML
Leave us alone
Today, a customer asked me if I was my husband's sister. A little flabbergasted, I replied, "No, I'm his wife." He went on to say, "Ah! But surely, you're related? Cousins?" FML
Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML
Today, I brought a boy home for the first time, only to have my dad ask him what his mother's maiden name was. When he answered, my dad exclaimed, "Oh yeah! I think I dated her in high school. I could be your father!" FML
Oh nooooo
Today, my supervisor at work is now my father-in-law. My girlfriend told me that. FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Congrats!
Today, I discovered that my father is getting married. Overjoyed and confused because I didn't know he was dating, I called him up to congratulate him, and ask who she was. Apparently, his soon to be fiancée is my mother-in-law. My wife is not happy. FML
Today, my parents, my aunt, and her husband went out to dinner. Once there, my aunt told us that she was pregnant. Out of instinct, I asked her who the father is. FML
Top comments
krushr 3
So...you're not, right?
juliahockey 0
hahahaha. that sucks. you should have played along. "yup and I love to bang her every night" and he will be like O.O
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Comments (151)
chosenen 6
Gj man! Keeping it fresh! Profit
morganpilling3 0
I've been asked if I was prego
FreebirdIII 1
are you?
cetlawizard 15
lol....I had once had an 8yr old girl ask me (I'm @5'4") if I was my ex-girlfriend's(she's 6'3 1/2") father (I'm Caucasian,& she's full blooded Native American Indian)...:)
AtrumMessor 1
That just means you have a hot wife. Look on the bright side, OP.
Taylorrrrr 0
That's what you get when your 60 years old married to a 24 year old!
vietmanx 10
that seems like a good problem to have
dakins 0
wow ppl r pricks aren't they, jeez. anywho! lol that sucks but look at it this way, ur wife must look young for this to happen, that good genetics she'll carry into her golden years. and ur already married so she picked. u. that says u have a young attractive wife who loves u stop complaining, unless she does. if so, buy a treadmill!
spanishfool 0
your wife must look good still, and isn't that what really is important here
singhjr96 0
some ones asked me if i was my sisters dad and i'm 14 lol
grievlocke 0
in that case when u graduated highschool she was how old? yea, that's what I thought.