Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot my parents are coming over. FML
Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML
Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics, I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML
Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML
Today, I taught my kid how to mow the lawn. It's a self-propelling mower so it's easy to handle. My kid thought it would be smart to tie the handle down so that he wouldn't have to push it at all. This resulted in the lawn mower blasting through our fence and sinking into my neighbor's pool. FML
Today, my neighbor finally cut the grass on his front lawn. At 2 in the morning. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to mow a dick into my grandmother's lawn, but the mower leaked gasoline and now there's a giant dead grass outline. FML
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
Today, my neighbor came over to borrow my lawnmower. As I have previously loaned it to him and he returned it broken, I refused. He then promptly ate the strawberries off my daughter's small strawberry plant and stormed off. FML
Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire two acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML
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Top comments
JE553 9
Quality kid with quality humor clearly
oh_merde 11
What a dick!
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Comments (67)
flashback_fml 14
I'll mow a penis into your yard for $5
IAmMe204 25
Who knew proposing could be so dangerous...! xD
ksks1234 33
Proposing to mow a penis in the yard? I guess you could get an appendage caught in the blades.
Schiffy 18
I think you commented on the wrong post.....
Slawter16 24
Managing to comment on the wrong post.. Classic fail.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Did you pay him up-front? If so, YDI. If not, FYL but at least you aren't out any money and can finish mowing yourself.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Oops, sorry, double-post.
AnnaLovr 7
That takes skill
KaylaTackett 18
That's why you don't pay anyone until the job is done correctly!
worldclassrager 41
The question is did you pay him upfront? Well part of it is done...just less for you to do...
dlowry004 14
If you paid the little hooligan I'm advance then YDI OP. if you didn't pay him, then you should have laughed it off, take a picture, and mowed the rest. That's funny and pretty impressive to do with a lawn mower.
thejimler 9
In fairness he did say he would mow the lawn, he just didn't mention that he wouldn't be doing the entire yard and that he'd draw a dong in the lawn. These are the sort of questions you need to ask people!
emuexport 4
Thats awesome, Penis art is always funny