Today, my worst fears were realized as an insect pinged off the back of my mouth while I was singing along to the radio on my motorcycle. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was riding my motorcycle when a guy cut me off at a light. I honked and swore at him when a bug flew into my mouth. FML
Today, on my way home on my motorbike from a great party in the early hours of the morning, I was feeling pretty good about myself. Riding over a hill, I yawned in anticipation of climbing into bed. A huge winged bastard insect thing then flew straight into my throat. FML
Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked, I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML
Today, while driving and singing, I noticed a large fly inside my car. I stopped singing so it wouldn't fly into my mouth. That didn't stop it from flying up my nose, causing me to swerve and drive into a ditch. FML
Today, I was riding my motorcycle on the highway and wearing all of my gear - boots, gloves, jacket, and full-face helmet. Somehow a bee found the only spot not covered on my body and stung my neck. I'm allergic to bees. FML
Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right inside my mouth. My tongue got stung. FML
Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML
Today, I was on a bike ride when a bug flew into my eye. Not wanting to stop, I figured I would just keep that eye closed until I could cry it out. Five seconds later, a bug flew into my other eye. FML
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
Today, while riding a roller coaster, I got hit in the chest by a wasp going 80 miles per hour. As if that didn't hurt enough, it somehow managed to survive and fall down my shirt. It crawled around and stung me a few times before the ride ended. FML
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Top comments
WebWarrior4991 9
I imagine the insect's worst fears were realized as well...
TheOneButNotOnly 15
Little fella just wanted to hear your singing better was all.
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Comments (47)
trucker2 33
The notes of a sour lemon, sent them to the black hole.... Poor bugs, may you swallow them in peace..... My I suggest you hummmm next time...The cleric is hard at time
lukian_fml 29
How was your gag reflex?
ifuckuprandomly 28
Isn't the sound of the exhaust all the music you need?
jelrid 30
Actually, my bike is pretty awesome!
rubberduck_of_doom 31
Shame on you for listening to Music on your bike and double shame on you for (apparently) not wearing a helmet!
asmb100 27
Not all helmets are full faced, and you can get little devices that go inside the helmet for communications and music. Also, bigger bikes come with speakers and radios.
Saikon1357 25
Wear a helmet YDI
jelrid 30
Yeah... I totally did deserve this one
jelrid 30
As some feedback seems to be in order: First of all, my bike is actually a large motor scooter, but pretty much all my friends refer to it as a motorcycle. I almost always wear a helmet when I'm out and about, but I was cruising home from work, and it was out in the country where pretty much nobody lives, so I figured I was probably fine. And the insect in question was, in fact, a honey bee. Many of the fields in the area use portable hives to help pollinate their crops.
ALonelyStranger 12
That's why you drive with a visor
alaina1104 11
A butterfly launched itself at my eye today. Thank God I was blinking!
livinginabook 24
Kelly Clarkson can't save you now!
jelrid 30
That's literally what I was listening to, #27!
livinginabook 24
Of course you were! X'D
RabidTardigrade 6
Helmet with windshield.