Today, my wife's pregnancy hormones got so bad that she freaked out and threw a tantrum, accusing me of always making important decisions for her. All I did was get her some food from Taco Bell as a surprise. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Hello from the other side
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML
Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML
Excuses, excuses
Today, my wife has been using "pregnancy hormones" as an excuse for absolutely everything. Spills a milkshake in bed at one in the morning? Pregnancy hormones! Cries about a hole in her sock? Pregnancy hormones! Gets caught fucking her coworker? Pregnancy hormones! FML
Playing favorites
Today, I was making dinner for my family while my wife was at work. She walked in the door with McDonald's, even though she knew I was cooking. Then our kids saw and started screaming that they wanted McDonald's too and that it was unfair. I've told her not to pull this shit and she won't listen. FML
Food for thought
Today, my girlfriend is mentally unhinged. She had a full on temper tantrum and ranted about healthy eating, and how she’s “fat” and needs to lose 30 pounds, all because I suggested Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner. She stormed out of the house. I later ran into her at a local pizza place, devouring a pizza. FML
Go long
Today, my husband threw an epic tantrum because I asked him to put away the leftovers from dinner. Yeah, because I guess me going to the grocery store, then preparing and serving the food AFTER working a 10 hour day wasn’t enough. Thanks babe. FML
On a promise
Today, my girlfriend invited me to her apartment for "Taco Tuesday date night", saying that she had "homemade tacos." She actually made homemade tacos for us to eat for dinner. Oh, and she was on her period. Fantasy ruined. FML
Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML
Today, my wife ate nothing all day due to her morning sickness, but I tried to get her to eat something light, for our baby's sake. I brought her a banana. She yelled at me for being a "pervert" and accused me of just wanting to watch her stick a phallic object in her mouth. FML
Neverending cycle
Today, my girlfriend threw a bitch fit about her clothes not fitting and how she’s “so fat” to the point of storming out of the house when I asked her to please calm down. Just a couple of hours earlier, we'd ordered food and she ordered a salad, then asked to trade my burger and fries with her. FML
Top comments
olpally 33
Awww, what a good husband you are. Don't worry, she'll forgive you later, hormones are like that.
uhnevermind 24
Maybe she doesn't want the *****?
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Comments (145)
sprinkesrdelish 5
if she's carrying your baby, she has a right to be crazy with hormones. sorry though OP
perdix 31
So, you tried to give her explosive diarrhea while she has hemorrhoids, and made her deliver an obese, diabetic baby? Looks like hormones made her smart!
JaegerMayCry 13
My last experience with taco bell broke my toilet.
Silvinomiae 20
A surprise for a surprise. Isn't it wonderful to live a life of unforeseen adventures?
Gingerette 8
These events are quite unfortunate.. Hormones are definitely hard to deal with on either side, so just try to have an understanding attitude, OP. And for future reference, if you back off and try to avoid confrontation, act sweet, and present gifts of small chocolates, the beast will be appeased.
thenewgirl29 20
Maybe she didn't want Taco Bell... Maybe she wanted something else, you could've just asked her, instead of assuming she had no preference! Sorry, I'm pregnant too so I understand her unjustified rage.
Rainhawk94 27
Shut your dirty pie hole
thenewgirl29 20
Wow, random Internet stranger. You really got me there.
dcats 13
That's a big decision. Life time big.
sarsh_34 4
I would have been excited and probably gave birth right there and then haha
luc887_fml 28
Food you choose for her IS an important decision lol after all she's eating for two !
bellebe1998 16
You obviously deserve this...
JaegerMayCry 13
he obviously doesn't, poor OP is at the receiving end of the estrogen stick
drshn 22
"obviously deserve this" is a bitch harsh don't you think. He just tried to be nice to her but taco Bell may not be the right place to eat for her.
buckdharma 38
She probably hasn't shaved in awhile (it seems to be a trend) and you want her to be smelly too. Op, she could turn into a Sasquatch.