Today, my wife's pregnancy hormones got so bad that she freaked out and threw a tantrum, accusing me of always making important decisions for her. All I did was get her some food from Taco Bell as a surprise. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML
Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML
Today, my wife has been using "pregnancy hormones" as an excuse for absolutely everything. Spills a milkshake in bed at one in the morning? Pregnancy hormones! Cries about a hole in her sock? Pregnancy hormones! Gets caught fucking her coworker? Pregnancy hormones! FML
Today, I was making dinner for my family while my wife was at work. She walked in the door with McDonald's, even though she knew I was cooking. Then our kids saw and started screaming that they wanted McDonald's too and that it was unfair. I've told her not to pull this shit and she won't listen. FML
Today, my girlfriend is mentally unhinged. She had a full on temper tantrum and ranted about healthy eating, and how she’s “fat” and needs to lose 30 pounds, all because I suggested Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner. She stormed out of the house. I later ran into her at a local pizza place, devouring a pizza. FML
Today, my husband threw an epic tantrum because I asked him to put away the leftovers from dinner. Yeah, because I guess me going to the grocery store, then preparing and serving the food AFTER working a 10 hour day wasn’t enough. Thanks babe. FML
Today, my girlfriend invited me to her apartment for "Taco Tuesday date night", saying that she had "homemade tacos." She actually made homemade tacos for us to eat for dinner. Oh, and she was on her period. Fantasy ruined. FML
Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML
Today, my wife ate nothing all day due to her morning sickness, but I tried to get her to eat something light, for our baby's sake. I brought her a banana. She yelled at me for being a "pervert" and accused me of just wanting to watch her stick a phallic object in her mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw a bitch fit about her clothes not fitting and how she’s “so fat” to the point of storming out of the house when I asked her to please calm down. Just a couple of hours earlier, we'd ordered food and she ordered a salad, then asked to trade my burger and fries with her. FML
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Top comments
olpally 33
Awww, what a good husband you are. Don't worry, she'll forgive you later, hormones are like that.
uhnevermind 24
Maybe she doesn't want the *****?
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Comments (145)
hayyyyleyyyybaby_fml 14
Did you forget the fire sauce?
SasquatchDeluxe 10
Think that's fun? Just wait until your wife accuses you of getting her pregnant without her consent ( despite the facts that a) you had both been planning a child and b) SHE jumped YOU without protection at a point where you both knew she was extremely fertile) while, at the same time, also accusing you of "not wanting the baby," without realizing the contradiction.
ScarlieC 25
Are you talking out of experience? Because that's the impression I get when I read your comment.
LadyLeo2885 2
Lol yea no. You always wait until we tell you what we want. Cravings change by the minute OP. Hopefully you're wife doesn't have that much longer for ya. FYL forreal lol
landonw347 12
Maybe you should ask her if you could "taco bout it".
bman54950 15
you're first mistake was getting taco bell
jeniaisling 6
Taco Bell food is a very important decision. You only surprise food on her if it's McDs, not the Bell, dude.
ScarlieC 25
Aw OP, that was very sweet of you! It sucks that your wife freaked out, but it'll be okay in the end. When I was pregnant I was very grumpy and then cried daily because I felt bad about being grumpy to my husband and son. They still tease me about it, but we all laugh about it too!
17deanju 2
Hang in there man... The baby will be here and grown up before you know it
Goblin182 27
Was she eating the tacos while she was screaming at you?
pedinhuh 23
So you wanted to make a surprise, thats cool and all but...Taco Bell, really? Also, she pregnant, better get used to these tantrums and the sudden humour changes. Btw, congratulation for the baby!