Today, my wife didn't say a word to me because her horoscope told her not to. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my fiancée said that our relationship is doomed because an astrologer said so. We only have a few more days until our wedding and she won't listen to a word I say. FML
Today, my wife yelled at me for admitting I take my wedding ring off at work. I explained that I work in a chemistry lab and don't want to damage it. She laughed and said, "Oh please, that chemistry stuff is nonsense anyway." All while reading her horoscope. FML
Today, my wife threatened to end our relationship if I didn't skip work and stay at home. She's into astrology, and apparently when one of those money-grubbing frauds writes, "Betrayal will come from someone close to you", it's reason enough to suspect that I'll cheat on her. FML
Affection breakdown
Today, my wife can't be bothered to do anything that isn't work, talk about her work, and sit on the sofa. Then she complains that I don't show any affection, when she can be bothered to even talk to me. FML
Stuck on amber
Today, my wife and mother of my kids said she doesn't want sex. Or a divorce. FML
Bad sign(s)
Today, my girlfriend started a month-long period of not talking to me. One of her male friends, who is a self-styled astrologist, told her there are "bad omens" in our relationship for the coming weeks. I don't know if I should dump her for being gullible or just plain stupid. FML
Today, my wife put divorce papers in my birthday card. FML
Marriage doesn't solve anything
Today, my wife told me how she really felt about me, and said she didn't love me anymore. We got married last month. FML
Puzzled
Today, I found out why my wife has been upset with me for the last week. She told me this morning that I did something to upset her on our date night last Friday, she won't tell me what, and she said she'll leave me if I do it again. FML
Told you so
Today, my wife is leaving me for the guy she told me not to worry about, who is also her ex. FML
Top comments
bthomas0319 2
Make a fake horoscope and make it say that you have to be your husband's slave and do whatever he says
kaylynheartsyou 10
Then dont talk to her for one day.
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Comments (246)
chocolate97 0
she Probly did it because she dont like you
BooGhosted 0
Gods way of telling someone to divorce? Seems rather contradictory to me.
funfofa 1
as long as the horoscope wasnt a gift from u...then FYL...but if it was...we then...smooth move dude
Awahso 25
Oh look, you changed your picture..by moving over to the left slightly xP
sweetheartxoxo88 7
Why do people even read horoscopes? If they were legit, there wouldn't be a completely different scenario in each magazine/newspaper for the same day.
theungvar 0
not always a bad thing
danny1560 0
i think thats a good thing
burningpassion69 6
then you should write her horoscope say you should blow your husband today
IncredibleJ 0
Hahahah
dph_84 8
It could be good that your wife refuses to talk to you.