Today, my wife decided that to help her stop smoking, she's also giving up the things that make her crave a cigarette. Sex is one of them. FML
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to quit smoking. My wife conveniently decided on the same day that she was going to start smoking. FML
Today, my wife has quit nicotine. As expected, she's put on some weight, but it's all gone to her butt, boobs, and hips. She looks better than ever, easily 5 years younger, but she's so upset about the weight gain that she refuses to let me touch her, and she wears baggy clothes 24/7 now. FML
Today, I found the list my wife made of the things she was going to give up for Lent. The first one was "Sex with other men". FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was over her addiction and wished to quit cold turkey. I cancelled all my plans to stay home and support her. She didn't mean her tobacco addiction, no no. Her corn chip addiction. FML
Today, I discovered my wife has been smoking weed for the past 2 years before she has sex with me. She said it was the only way she could force herself to have sex with me. FML
Today, my wife has quit smoking weed. Now she can stay up all night, whereas before she fell asleep around 9 almost every night, so now I get absolutely no time to myself. FML
Today, I was having sex when a cigarette craving came on. I don't know what's worse, the fact I asked for a cigarette break in the middle of sex or I take that long. FML
Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend, who is embarrassed of her smoking habit and wants to quit, to smoke in front of me to break the shame. I was loving, supportive, and cheerful, and I kissed her after. I also got a boner. Now I wish she wouldn’t quit. FML
Today, is another day that my wife will choose anything over sex. I don't want to flirt with her anymore. If I can't have a normal sex life, I would rather embrace celibacy. I love her and was flirting with her daily up until now, but if she needs some other kind of confirmation to feel sexy, she can go ahead and find it. I'm done. FML
Today, my wife decided to quit nicotine. I came home to find my Xbox, Playstation, Switch, and PC burning in our fire pit. FML
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Top comments
Happygofucky 0
Don't worry, once the stress from not smoking kicks in she will be begging you for a release. Have fun!
Woodsy007 0
wow. seriously? it's all about you. I'm so sorry your wife is trying to extend her life and a fantastic thing like quitting smoking. but oh no, it SUCKS being you because your just going to die without sex. boohoo.
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Comments (323)
cheerislove 0
hmmm. maybe since she will stop smoking she will be able to last longer during sex. its all worth it in the end!.(: haha.
hotchick90037 3
haha you know most people smoke because of stress so maybe your just not good in bed!
datkiddralf180 0
personally I'd just say "alright so ur giving me ******** till you quit" :)
zendaddy0 0
yah smokings bad m'kay
Popatopagain 0
Better buy extra lube, sound like your gonna need it
tulsafml 0
Mama Miaaa!
Skatejock21 0
Smoking is bad anyways and not worth starting. The least you could do is be supportive... would you rather have the woman you love die due to smoking or not have sex during her quitting period? If you don't let her stop smoking, you'll lose both options.
CheapGodiva 0
She's only saying that because she doesn't want you to know she's actually cheating on you.
gogokira 5
The sex was so bad that she decide to slowly kill herself by smoking.
xx5pid3rmanxx 3
no.7 her health means alot to him I'm sure it does but no sex!?! that's a heaping pile of bullshit and you know it. cuz wen "infidelity" comes around then you wonder why. lol cuz of crap like that wuts that word u women love to use?? oh yeah compromise!