Today, my virgin girlfriend who wanted to lose her virginity to me got on Google, and quizzed me on how to properly put on a condom. She doesn't trust me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, with whom I am genuinely in love. Right after I'd got the condom on, she said, "You do know this is break-up sex, right?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have sex for the first time. Not only did he struggle for five minutes to put on a condom (repeatedly snapping himself in the balls), but he then had to ask me "which hole" to put it in. I'm dating a thirty-four year old virgin. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me to Google how to last longer in bed. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she didn't want to get it on with me because she didn't want to "ruin my innocence." FML
Today, my mom taught my boyfriend of 2 weeks how to put on a condom. FML
Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML
Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me play porn while we were getting busy. The girl in the video said, "You don't need a condom, you can just pull out." I noticed she had a caesarean scar and burst out laughing. My girlfriend stormed out before I could explain. FML
Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML
Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML
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Top comments
Froley 0
Just because she wants to make sure she's safe and you know what you're doing, you think she doesn't trust you? Be happy that she trusts you enough to take her virginity. YDI.
cabbitt 0
I don't trust you either.
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Comments (136)
LaFHlax 0
what'd you get on the quiz?
the4starr 3
it's probably not that she doesn't trust you, she's just careful .
Lisa89 3
can't she just do it herself if she doesn't trust you? But good for her for being careful
LA_Barbie 11
Haha! Owned by a virgin. hillarious! but YDI you better know what you're doing or else you will have bigger problems.
trueblue170 13
"Owned by a virgin" And the fact that she's a virgin matters because...?
ami1043 0
Ha. I did this to my boyfriend too.
xNephilim 19
Get over yourself, she was just being responsible.
flyingshrimp 2
That's okay. Better that you know how to do it properly and nothing happens right? Even if you're not a virgin and she is, she wants to be sure for herself. My boyfriend of over 2 years still makes me put the condom on him because I'm the one who did the research and he doesn't want to mess it up.
jmcr 27
Cant blame her for being careful its her first time and she doesnt want to get knocked up on the first time
crazy4uboi 6
If she is going to let you take her virginity then she deffinetley(God I hate that word!) trusts you, she's probably just nervous because it is her first time.
HarroIAmBob 21
if you hate that word, learn how to spell it right.
jabfinch 9
YDI for not making your trust to her apparent enough.