Today, my uncle gave me a lecture on how I eat too much "unhealthy" junk food, and that it can be very harmful for me. All the while smoking a cigarette. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my older brother offered me a cigarette. I took it and barely took a drag before he socked me in the arm and lectured me for taking the offer. He's an alcoholic, and smokes daily. FML
Today, my uncle visited for the first time in three years. It would have been very wholesome, if not for the fact that I got to see for myself just how badly his health has deteriorated. He's morbidly obese, a heavy smoker, and his voice is terrifying. I almost thought he was a pedophile when I first saw him. FML
Today, once again I tried to convince my dad to stop smoking. And once again, while I was speaking, he lit up a cigarette and smoked until my asthma flared up and I was wheezing so hard that I had to leave the room. FML
Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML
Today, my brother's home for his annual visit, lectures my parents once about their eating habits. They promptly throw away all of their junk food. I'm there every Sunday, and have been telling them to eat healthier for medical reasons. They never listen. He's in sales, and I'm in med school. FML
Today, my mother tried to tell me that nicotine is the only substance that ensures weight loss, and that nicotine has been passed down in our family for over 5 generations of heavy smoking relatives. Then she encouraged me to start smoking. FML
Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML
Today, I reprimanded my daughter for eating too many chips, since it's not good for you. She responded with, "Know what else isn't good for you? Two cigarettes a day." I couldn't even come up with a retort. I can't believe I just got burned by a ten-year-old. FML
Today, I scolded my son at a buffet after he pointed at an obese woman in a motorized wheelchair and asked how anyone could let themselves get so unhealthy. As I lectured him on genetics and thyroid problems, she rolled past with a plate stacked with an obscene amount of fried food. FML
Today, my parents have smoked for most of their lives and are both healthy as horses. Meanwhile, I smoked for two years, then went through hell quitting, and just had my first asthma attack and was lectured about "long term effects of tobacco, even after cessation." THIS IS BULLSHIT! FML
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Top comments
Angitia 8
Not surprising. Hypocrisy is 'in'.
WCARlover 35
Do as I say, not as I do
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Comments (146)
Articfox420 5
Do what you want, life's short
TheyCallMeDamien 18
He's trying to save your life not his.
noisebox 1
You could have told him all you are missing is a smoke after eating
noisebox 1
On second I would have told him nowadays everything is laced with cancer causing additives and that there is no longer anything healthy to eat...
5HAD0W 4
Too much junk food IS unhealthy no matter who tells you.
FranzFerdinand 18
Do as I say, not as I do. *puff*
circulareasoning 2
Smoking cigarettes is not nearly as bad for you as junk food. That's common knowledge.
KBear3109 29
Did you miss the memo about cancer?
NatalieMalik 0
Tht happens to me all the time
numbersystem 4
Uncle is correct. "ad hominem tu quoque" look it up.
Haybo1774 0
I think we may have the same uncle...