Today, my uncle gave me a lecture on how I eat too much "unhealthy" junk food, and that it can be very harmful for me. All the while smoking a cigarette. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my older brother offered me a cigarette. I took it and barely took a drag before he socked me in the arm and lectured me for taking the offer. He's an alcoholic, and smokes daily. FML
He's got the look
Today, my uncle visited for the first time in three years. It would have been very wholesome, if not for the fact that I got to see for myself just how badly his health has deteriorated. He's morbidly obese, a heavy smoker, and his voice is terrifying. I almost thought he was a pedophile when I first saw him. FML
Today, once again I tried to convince my dad to stop smoking. And once again, while I was speaking, he lit up a cigarette and smoked until my asthma flared up and I was wheezing so hard that I had to leave the room. FML
Crisis control
Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML
Today, my brother's home for his annual visit, lectures my parents once about their eating habits. They promptly throw away all of their junk food. I'm there every Sunday, and have been telling them to eat healthier for medical reasons. They never listen. He's in sales, and I'm in med school. FML
Dumbass idea
Today, my mother tried to tell me that nicotine is the only substance that ensures weight loss, and that nicotine has been passed down in our family for over 5 generations of heavy smoking relatives. Then she encouraged me to start smoking. FML
Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML
She's not wrong
Today, I reprimanded my daughter for eating too many chips, since it's not good for you. She responded with, "Know what else isn't good for you? Two cigarettes a day." I couldn't even come up with a retort. I can't believe I just got burned by a ten-year-old. FML
Health and wellbeing
Today, I scolded my son at a buffet after he pointed at an obese woman in a motorized wheelchair and asked how anyone could let themselves get so unhealthy. As I lectured him on genetics and thyroid problems, she rolled past with a plate stacked with an obscene amount of fried food. FML
On fire
Today, my parents have smoked for most of their lives and are both healthy as horses. Meanwhile, I smoked for two years, then went through hell quitting, and just had my first asthma attack and was lectured about "long term effects of tobacco, even after cessation." THIS IS BULLSHIT! FML
Top comments
Angitia 8
Not surprising. Hypocrisy is 'in'.
WCARlover 35
Do as I say, not as I do
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Comments (146)
AugustBurnsToast 14
It would've been hard for me not to stare at him in awe. What a walking contradiction haha.
mazio09210517 5
next starburst commercial? I think so.
unknown_user5566 27
Your uncle was definitely a hyprocrite here, but that doesn't make him wrong. Keep eating your junk food- everyone does it- just do it in moderation. Also... why is the word unhealthy framed with quotes? Do you not think junk food is bad for you?
Pilkipedia 8
You're very pretty, KyleeKay.
loserboii 11
Maybe that was the humorous part about what he said?
thesubconscious 9
Adults seem to do that very often...
lajaynay 15
Die and let die.
sexygurllolz 1
i guess you both live by the 'yolo' motto
FMLshark 12
No one who has a slight hint of dignity should ever live by the "YOLO" motto. I thumbed you down for mentioning that god awful acronym, and for your equally god awful username.
ChickInGreenVans 12
Power to the BigMac!! *Nomm Nomm!!
br0ccoli 15
Goes to show that just because you know better doesn't mean you're going to follow what you know. Shoot, I've been trying to lose 10lbs for summer and even though I KNOW I should be at the gym everyday, I'm not. Boo. I wish I were a Sim and take away my own free will and just do it. *sigh* Cheeseburger, how badly my mouth wants to have a love affair with your juicy deliciousness.
bete_noire_fml 7
Anyone else think of that south park episode with rob reiner?
ChickInGreenVans 12
Not until you just mentioned it now..
bete_noire_fml 7
Glad i could make you think of south park...my good deed is done for the day.
hecallsmedarlin 7
Tell your uncle how right he is, *sets food down; lights cig* & tell him you would much rather lose a lung and probably get cancer than become obese and get something like diabetes. They both may be bad, but it may make him realize you both should quit your bad habits :)