Today, my step-dad tried to talk me into getting plastic surgery. His reasoning: "Let's face it, 28 and single? Look, I know your mum gave you shitty genes, but that's no excuse to avoid fixing your face, honey." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I mentioned to my family that I was sad about the fact that I was thirty-five years-old, single, and had no children. My father piped up from the next room, "What man in his right would want your lopsided tits, fat thighs, and fucked-up nose in their gene pool?" FML
Today, my sister tried to convince me to go to a plastic surgeon, because "Bitchface Syndrome's no joke." FML
Today, my father decided to "prepare" me for the real world by telling me that I'm ugly. FML
Today, I told my parents I wanted to try modelling. I thought that since I have such a low self-esteem, that it might benefit me, and make me feel better about myself and how I look. The first thing out of my dad's mouth was, "What? Why? You're ugly." Thanks dad. FML
Today, I told my mom I want to get liposuction. She said "Whats the point? Its not like you can get lipo on your face!". FML
Today, I met some guys from my dad's workplace. They told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded, "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML
Today, my stepfather-to-be yelled at me, insisting I take my nose piercing out, because it will "ruin the wedding photos" since I'm a bridesmaid. It's a tiny diamante stud, no bigger than a small pinhead. He then went on a rant about how I need to respect his authority in the family. I'm 25. FML
Today, I overheard my dad telling my mum that the only way I'm ever going to get into a relationship is if I "pose as a woman and con some gullible bastard online." He's probably right. FML
Today, my father was telling me that one of the benefits about his job was that the family could get discounts, then asked if I'd like some. My dad's a plastic surgeon. FML
Today, in thanks for my assistance, a customer recommended me a plastic surgeon who could "really help with that face." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
PaigeLeeAnn11 23
Your step-dad is a dick.
Wittledinosaure 7
He's looking out for your future. What a great guy.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (102)
hope4life 9
God made you, every detail, God NEVER makes mistakes. I don't have to see you to tell you your beautiful.
Steffi 26
*you're
Dilwann 27
Also: don't assume everyone agrees that God is real. I'm pro evolution. So her mom gave her the genes. And the sense of 'beautiful' is a social term. People can be ugly, made by God or not. You're just not supposed to treat them in a bad way for that.
TechFire 25
Silence everyone! I have an important announcement to make! *clears throat* GOD ISN'T REAL! Thank you all for your time. :)
TogeBara 12
Pro evolution does not discount the theory of a higher power, it simply tells of evolution. Darwin himself was religious. Evolution is a theory of change and behavioral learning. Evolution is killing a spider with an insecticide one week and not being able to kill another one with the same insecticide next week. It is the theory of adaptation and does not, in any way whatsoever, discount any religion. A basic high school education would have served you well here, maybe you wouldn't have opened your mouth in ignorance. Oh and one more thing, I am sorry about the rant, but when someone acts like evolution is an alternate to religion I must proceed to apply the smack down. Evolution is NOT an alternate to religion, they are two completely different topics.
TogeBara 12
You people can downvote me all you want, but my comment is true and factual. Get real and learn something
kidsgotastinky 11
What an asswipe
Ella_fml 17
That was so rude of him, but maybe you could use it as constructive criticism, like in my Big Fat Greek Wedding. The dad criticized the daughter, and then she got out, she got better clothes, started wearing makeup and got a perfect boyfriend. No plastic surgery, and there's nothing wrong with being single at 28, you got time!
imtooshy 18
Nothing wrong with being single at age 28. As for your step dad, he's a major asshole, ignore his thoughts and opinions and be grateful that he is just your STEP dad. Sorry OP, he's clearly unhappy with his own life if he's gotta feel good by picking at yours.
D3ATHZ3RO 15
What a ******* tool!
chosha_fml 27
You'll never find anyone with your mum's genes. And yet he's with your mum. Interesting logic there, step-dad. :S
Rosemary072098 11
Wait... if he's your step-dad, them why would he think your mom is ugly… wouldn't they be together?
Fedezzer 20
Get a biology lesson, for the love of science.
JingleBelly 5
yUP, WHAT A TOOL
Moobug 4
Wait... there are straight blokes in Merthyr who call people 'honey'?
AwkGirl 9
Because, of course it's HIS job to tell her how to look. A particularly disgusting example of society's way of viewing the female body as public property. Ugh. And yeah, I know it's her FATHER saying this--that actually doesn't make it better, or change the fact that he had absolutely no right to say that.
Shade1982 21
Actually, with all the freedom-of-speech crap going around, he has every right to say that.