Today, my step-dad tried to talk me into getting plastic surgery. His reasoning: "Let's face it, 28 and single? Look, I know your mum gave you shitty genes, but that's no excuse to avoid fixing your face, honey." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I mentioned to my family that I was sad about the fact that I was thirty-five years-old, single, and had no children. My father piped up from the next room, "What man in his right would want your lopsided tits, fat thighs, and fucked-up nose in their gene pool?" FML
Today, my sister tried to convince me to go to a plastic surgeon, because "Bitchface Syndrome's no joke." FML
Today, my father decided to "prepare" me for the real world by telling me that I'm ugly. FML
Today, I told my parents I wanted to try modelling. I thought that since I have such a low self-esteem, that it might benefit me, and make me feel better about myself and how I look. The first thing out of my dad's mouth was, "What? Why? You're ugly." Thanks dad. FML
Today, I told my mom I want to get liposuction. She said "Whats the point? Its not like you can get lipo on your face!". FML
Today, I met some guys from my dad's workplace. They told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded, "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML
Today, my stepfather-to-be yelled at me, insisting I take my nose piercing out, because it will "ruin the wedding photos" since I'm a bridesmaid. It's a tiny diamante stud, no bigger than a small pinhead. He then went on a rant about how I need to respect his authority in the family. I'm 25. FML
Today, I overheard my dad telling my mum that the only way I'm ever going to get into a relationship is if I "pose as a woman and con some gullible bastard online." He's probably right. FML
Today, my father was telling me that one of the benefits about his job was that the family could get discounts, then asked if I'd like some. My dad's a plastic surgeon. FML
Today, in thanks for my assistance, a customer recommended me a plastic surgeon who could "really help with that face." FML
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Top comments
PaigeLeeAnn11 23
Your step-dad is a dick.
Wittledinosaure 7
He's looking out for your future. What a great guy.
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Comments (102)
jw90 18
Well depending on if you want to take it as constructive criticism or just plain mean will determine the outcome.
EvilUndead 9
Beat the crap out of him?
guci101 14
#Butterface?
ksks1234 33
Why do people use # for everything?! Shouldn't this be reserved to just twitter?
ShakeDisPlace 10
Beauty is on the inside OP.
ghil_fml 7
awww... what a dad lol..
fml0505 22
You know people can still see on blind dates, right? Blind dating on the other hand, could be something worth looking into.
worldclassrager 41
Is he sure his genes didn't do that to you? If you have had a previous relationship you don't need it and you probably have someone looking for you...
MzZombicidal 36
He's her step-father. So, yeah, he's sure his genes had nothing to do with it.
titibug823 11
So your step dad insults you, and insults your mother by saying she gave you crappy genes? Yeah, he's a real keeper....
pinguino3669_fml 23
Well if your dad married your mom and thinks that about her, he must not really mind.
Shorty777 4
Did he just call your mother ugly??