Today, my school is having a mandatory class on etiquette. We've just now progressed onto forks after a long, tedious discussion on spoons. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was eager to learn how to use chopsticks, as I was in a nice Chinese restaurant and had ordered noodles. As I was visibly struggling to eat, the server brought me a fork. When I reached for it, I flicked a noodle into a lady's soup at the next table. FML
Today, I was so bored that I spent two hours researching the history of spoons. FML
Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML
Today, a white guy tried to teach me to use chopsticks properly. I'm Chinese and have been using them since I could eat. FML
Today, during my second day on the job, I ate pasta with a pen in the backroom. My old job provided plasticware, and it never occurred to me to pack a fork. FML
Today, I was doing my homework on the computer when my dad walked by with a plate of food, threw his fork at me, and said "POSTURE!" FML
Today, my mom insisted on making my lunch. She didn't know that knives are banned at my high school, and packed me a steak knife for cream cheese. I'm now suspended for 7 days, and she refuses to say that she did anything wrong. FML
Today, my freshman students got in a fist fight over a chair. FML
Today, in the class I'm teaching, I assigned my students an essay to complete for homework. One student asked me if I was deducting points for bad spelling. I teach English. FML
Today, I learned that my aunt, who lives with us, is using our chopsticks in her hair and putting them back in the utensil drawer without washing them. I'm the one that uses chopsticks the most. FML
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Top comments
Olovio 5
Bet you can't wait for sporks!
W0 0
Fork your life!!
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Comments (197)
lunax_fml 14
hey! what are you a barbarian? you should consider yourself lucky, those are valuable skills to have!
d4_user 5
if you cannot see the point in learning etiquette, i am afraid you simply aren't mature enough to recognize the importance yet. when you're eating with the CEO and VP of your job 15 years from now, you will either be (1) thankful that you learned your manners, (2) ashamed that you didn't and have embarrassed yourself by behaving crassly, or (3) still too immature and oblivious to realize that you've done so, and are soon to be unemployed.
baconandkittens 10
OP never said that it wasn't important, but etiquette is dreadfully boring to learn. Just like math, every recognizes its importance, but really, most people wouldn't want to learn about it.
writergirl23 19
Haha and you're not listening. You know how I can tell? You're using present tense
heathermarie5 0
Good, now maybe the kids in your school won't act like fools and learn how to act in public.
ty4nier 16
one of my teachers gave us a lecture on fences for an hour. during english class
doglover100 29
We learned about etiquette in my cooking class.