Today, my period has given to me 4 giant zits, 3 screaming shits, 2 stomach ulcers, and a fever blister on my lips. A few days until Christmas and the gifts keep coming. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I received the gifts of my period, diarrhea, severe dizziness and double vision, and an ant infestation in my home. These were followed by the glaring absence of any gifts from my husband. Happy 40th to me. FML
Today, I have a UTI that spread to my kidneys, a yeast infection, and a herpes outbreak. Oh, and my period came this morning. FML
Today, for the first time in years, my period is early. I woke up at 5 a.m. with the worst cramps I've ever had in my life. Medicine isn't helping. It's literally so bad I feel like I want to throw up. It's fucking Christmas but hey, it wouldn't be 2022 if my garbage pile of a body wasn't ruining something for me. FML
Today, I woke up bleeding from every orifice in my body. I've got a nose bleed from my medication, my gums bled when I brushed my teeth, I'm on my period, and I have hemorrhoids. FML
Today, I have both a cold and a period. Tomorrow, I will have a cold, my period and my wisdom teeth taken out. FML
Today, I woke up with my period. At least I'm getting into the Christmas spirit with red and green shorts, right? FML
Today, it's 3 days before Christmas and my first day of holidays. Today is also the first day I have been sick all year. Hello tonsillitis, goodbye fun. FML
Today, I have the flu, food poisoning, and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML
Today, I found out I have a yeast infection, a bladder infection, and a urinary tract infection all at the same time. Oh, and I also have the flu. FML
Today, I found out that instead of having four wisdom teeth, I have eight. They all have to be removed as soon as possible, which happens to be over the Christmas break. I get to spend my whole vacation in excruciating pain and a swollen face to boot. FML
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Top comments
CMYKorBust 7
...and a partridge in a pear tree ?
breedles 28
I mean, that's awful, obviously, but damn. This was really cleverly written, OP
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Comments (52)
fun_fml 0
Hey, you know, shit happens to the F'ing best of us.
Bearsmomma 30
I also had an IUD. 2 back to back and didn't have a period for 8 years. Can't wait to get off these bc pills and back to an IUD. These periods (every 3rd month) are just inconvenient. I'm gonna try for a hysterectomy once insurance kicks in (my doctor has already said he's in favor of it) , but an IUD will be 2nd best if money becomes an issue.
justwillie62226 4
is it sad i read that to the tune of "12 days of christmas*?
writergirl1029 17
I feel you. It's Christmas Eve and I can feel my period reviving up.
MyS3lf 24
I'm very sorry you're suffering, but that was pretty clever. Hope you feel better soon.
Sharall 10
I sang this lol
Gradask 10
If you have stomach ulcers, you need antibiotics because 8 times out of 10 it caused by Helicobacter pylori (H. pylori). Or you have rare genetic disease or hernia.
eggfriend22 4
And a partridge in a pear tree!
lilithfury 23
Herpes on Christmas.... Damn. Sucks for you.
xbaconator9000x 16
How festive!