Today, my mum and I decided to go on a hike. Beforehand we left my car at the end of the trail and took my mums car to the beginning. After 4 hours we arrived at my car. I had left my keys in mums car. It was a long walk back. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friends and I finished a 2 day, 40km bush walk. We parked a car at the finish of the track and drove another car to the start, so we could drive back and pick it up when we finished. At the end of the trek, I realised I had left the keys for the second car in the first car. FML
Today, I reached into my pocket and found my mom's car keys. I'm a four hour drive away, and she obviously can't come to pick them up. FML
Today, after locking my keys in the car and waiting three hours for my mom to bring me my spare, I reached into my bag only to find my keys. FML
Today, I went to the supermarket; it was taking me ages to walk home because of the heavy food bags. Halfway home, I realised I had gone in my car. I had to walk all the way back to get my car. FML
Today, due to bad weather, my dad let me take his car to drive to my apartment 3 hours away. I only realized when I got there that my keys were still sitting on my parents' kitchen counter. FML
Today, my mom and I made the bad decision to go hiking for some mother-daughter bonding even though we had little experience. My mother tumbled down a mountain named Tumbledown and I couldn't even enjoy the irony because I had to half carry her all the way back to the car. FML
Today, I couldn't get to work because I couldn't find my car keys. It turns out, my mother took them and put them "somewhere safe." She can't remember where they are. FML
Today, I thought it would be romantic to take my girlfriend to the beach. It was raining so we left our shoes and phones in the car so we wouldn't be bothered. Apparently, I left my keys in the car too. The car was locked. FML
Today, we were running late for school so my mum shouted at me to hurry up and get in the car. I put my school bags in the boot of the car and my mum drove off. It wasn't until she got to my school and told me to get out that she realised I wasn't there. FML
Today, I finally got home after driving solo for 4 full days across Australia. I left my house keys where I started. FML
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Top comments
DrAwesome 6
This wouldn't have been a problem if you'd remembered to bring your emergency jetpacks.
sweet_candy_ 17
yaaaay you got some exercise :)
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Comments (161)
DrAwesome 6
This wouldn't have been a problem if you'd remembered to bring your emergency jetpacks.
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
They left the jetpack keys in the car!
beeship321 5
Am I the only one who realized this has been on fml before?
mdog1114 0
agreed
BethiiGeex 0
Lol xD
bwhahaha_fml 10
13 you are correct.
kofinater 3
wtf happened to my first, I actually made a legit comment...
the_flirtt 0
now thats a good hike :)
madarchod 0
Don't tell me after getting your car keys you walked back all the way to your car, coz that will not be FML anymore but will be "I am so stupid that I don't deserve to write FML"
Grammar_Police 0
well, arent you a clever one?
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
Reminds me off the time me and bear grylls were lost in a nature preserve, he told me that the only way to survive was for us to make sweet love....thanks to bear im still alive today
TooAsianMane 0
it happeneds. sucks for u tho. hope u lost a few pounds.
TooAsianMane 0
Yo the flirt, my friend said he saw your profile pic on this **** site. haha that's pretty sad dude. seems that you like 3 sums with the guys being bi. gross man.
KingDingALing 9
73- Why was your friend on a website where there was 3 guys having sex?
nerdsgetmehot 23
#73 Not everyone thinks guy-on-guy action is gross. I don't! :P
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
#75 everyone who isn't a flaming gay does
KingDingALing 9
I throw up when I see two guys kissing. I would throw up and shit my pants at the same time if I were to see three guys kissing.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#86 Your homophobia makes me a little nauseous.
pooper19 3
I heard that if u have crabs and u hold a mirror in front of your crotch they will all jump off thinking that it's another crotch is this true?
Person000 0
#73 did this friend who happened to be on a gay **** site happen to be you? and yes 'the flirts' picture is probably fake, he's just trying to act cool.
pooper19 3
I've never seen someone trying to act cool by putting a fake pic up damn him
voodoopandaa 0
hahaha :D
megaluke 0
ydi for being a smartass
xBIG_Dx 0
#88 to me two guys kissing is nasty and i start to throw up when i see it also, and fwi it doesnt make me a homophobe it just means im not gay
dudeitsdanny 10
No, it means you're both whiny ******* =) I'm straight, I've seen plenty of men kissing, especially when I'm up near Castro in SF. I've never felt disgust. Maybe I'm not trying to overcompensate to hide something, though.. But the two of you need to get your heads out of your asses(as much as you may enjoy it), and stop exaggerating, because it makes you look like pricks trying to hide their homosexuality by butching it up and overcompensating.
Zebidee 9
Danny, In my experience, the biggest mistake straight guys make about homosexuality is that it in some way revolves around them. How many times have you heard a straight guy go "That dude's a fag! What if he tries to have sex with me?!!" or "Lesbians - hurr - 3sum". In both cases, there's very little chance that either would happen. I'm straight, but I'm not an idiot.
MidgetMonster 0
You are so dumb, you are really dumb, fo' real.
rock999 0
WTF ????
JGood09 0
Hahaha 139 win. Antoine Dodson FTW
chloec16 0
139!!! hahahahahaha win!!!!!!
CoachLlama 5
I give you a 10 on planning. A FAIL on implementation.
HeyDontReadThis 0
did you drink your own piss after?
Autobot93 10
What about the teleportation devices?!
ajh557 22
@60 if your a pussy
sweet_candy_ 17
yaaaay you got some exercise :)
aardvarkish 17
Yes! Look on the bright side. (What the HELL??!!)
gunman15 4
true
JUST_STFU_N_GTFO 0
18, if she got blisters it was her own fault. She should had been wearing comfortable shoes or better yet— sandals.
elbenno3 0
dang
ohthebloodygore 16
114, you're an idiot. If you're walking for four hours, you're going to get blisters. Not always, but for someone who isn't used to walking that much, then yes. Obviously OP isn't accustomed to it if he/she had to write an FML about the walk.
Night22_fml 4
What's wrong with your eyebrows?
DevianceIsBliss 0
Well that's too freaking bad. Stop whining and start walking, my friend.
DrAwesome 6
Either FML is acting up by putting my comment twice, or this is DrAwesome's evil twin brother, DrAwesome. He is equally as handsome.
rainbowsherbet 0
haha. dr.awesome is so awesome it's squared!
CitizenSnipz 0
that's awesome
TitDirt 0
Maybe its because you're such an idiot that they wanted to clone you in hopes of making less of a dumb ass but failed and now they have double the idiocy on their hands.
DrAwesome 6
My mom never got me a troll doll when I was little. Now I have a troll of my very own. :3
PushMyButtons 5
wellllll that was stupid. sorry OP that was all in you (and partly on your mom)
dudeitsdanny 10
It was stupid. And the second or third time it happens to an FML user, lol. You'd think they'd learn ;D
MrsLender_fml 3
Haha but it'll happen again.. and again.. and again.
keekah 0
Well that sucks but that is definitely something you make sure you have before walking off.
yafuckyourlife 4
Today, my dog died. I'm blind. FML
pooper19 3
I wore my hat in the tanning bed on accident
Zebidee 9
In that case, how can you tell? Maybe it's just very very still?
yafuckyourlife 4
Well, if that was the case he's dead now. By the way, dog doesn't taste as bad as you'd think. Hey, don't judge! I was running low on food.
Zebidee 9
Haha! Never tried dog (yet)... I did have a horse sausage the other day, which was kinda freaky, but that's another story.
KasCiaYr 0
huh?
MetallicaRules19 4
i had kangaroo yeterday >.<
Zebidee 9
#133 - I used to have kangaroo pretty often in Australia, but here in Germany, it's as rare as - well - kangaroo meat. They're big into game meats here though, which is more or less the same. #112 - what was the 'huh?' to? The horse sausage comment? It's the first time I've ever tried it, but it's not that unusual outside of the English-speaking world. Google 'horse meat' for a quick overview.
yafuckyourlife 4
Actually, it's not that unusual IN the English-speaking world either.
Charlotteeexx 0
I have never understood how people manage to lock their keys in the car?
JayBear14 11
OP didn't, he just forget them in his mom's car.
binkybaby 3
I'm not sure about other people, but I've done it. I had just gotten my new car, and didn't realize that the doors lock after you start it...but more like a minute after, so I got out and closed the door and PRESTO keys in locked car.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Mr. Doe works for AAA. He's gotten real (ie, not prank) calls from people who've locked *themselves* inside their cars. I shit you not.
Charlotteeexx 0
aha, I get it now :)
MeganCello 8
This why the human race needs to learn how to fly. Sorry, OP.
aardvarkish 17
You'd think!
Syrael 0
agreed!!
maybaybe 0
Haha how awesome would that be?!
jakeisawake 3
Ha, niiiiiiice.