Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in to the doctors to test for any allergies. I did what she had asked and went to my room. I came down stairs later and found her in the bathroom putting my pee on a pregnancy test stick. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to go to the clinic for a physical. The nurse asked me for a pee sample; however, I had no urine to give. After 20 minutes of standing at the stall I was able to squeeze half a cup of pee. As I approached the sink to cover the sample, I somehow managed to drop it all over myself. FML
Today, my mother had to take a stool sample because she has been ill for several days. Curious, I eventually had to ask, "How did you intercept the poo before it got submerged in water?" She yelled from the other room, "You know that little plate with the red stripe?" I was eating off it. FML
Today, my mom came into my room, yelling at me about a pregnancy test that she found in my bathroom. My mom wouldn't believe me when I said it wasn't mine. Turns out my sister bought the test, threw it under my bathroom cabinet, and now she won't admit to the prank. She thinks this is hilarious. FML
Today, I took a pregnancy test. When I saw that the result was positive, I started crying and showed my mom. She burst out laughing and told me that I had taken an ovulation test. FML
Today, I had to get a urine analysis done for my doctor. I take medicine that makes me a little shaky sometimes. Guess who spilled their pee all over themselves while trying to put the lid on. FML
Today, after taking a pregnancy test and carefully disposing of all the evidence so no one would find out, I realized I left the receipt for it on the bathroom counter. I noticed too late as I watch my mom step out of the bathroom, and my step-father go in right after. FML
Today, my mom called me and said, "I made your sister laugh so hard she peed her pants." I got home and noticed she also peed on my bed. FML
Today, I went to the store to go buy a pregnancy test because my period was 7 days late. I get home, go into the bathroom, pull down my underwear, pee and come to find out I'd started my period when I looked at it after peeing on it. FML
Today, my mom forced me to take a drug test while she watched. I couldn’t do it due to nerves, so she grounded me because, "there's no way I would be nervous unless I was doing drugs." Nope, just a shy bladder. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for a physical. I've been sitting in the doctor's bathroom for 10 minutes now, trying to think of how to tell him I accidentally tripped and spilled my urine sample on the carpet. FML
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Top comments
Hannah_fml 0
i totally thought it would have ended up as a drug test, not a pregnancy test.
Nuklear 0
clever.
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Comments (193)
greenman_fml 0
#81 http://www.thegreenmancostume.com/greenman.gif I am no Wiccan. The will of the Lord states that all witches should be burned at the stake. I'm looking at you everyone who thought I was serious.
TheAntiComment 0
must be noone watches it's always sunny in philadelphia lmao, great show and choice of name man
blahthing 0
=S That's just so not cool. That is a total invasion of privacy, and not very good parenting.
MonkeySpeaks 4
Ellykhoshkele If you want people to take you seriously here are a few pointers. 1) It is "what" not "wat" 2) It is Because... or if you prefer the slang...'cause. Not cuz. Unless you are using a slang spelling reference to your cousin. 3) "You're" or "your," not "ur." Your typing makes you seem more like a 14-year-old. Which takes away most of your (if not all) credibility in this subject matter. 4) If you really are a psych major and a teen the I assume you either graduated early or are only 18 or 19. This means you are a Freshman. Which means, you think you are way smarter and know more than you are or do. If you are just talking out of your rear end and are still in highschool, take the previous statement and multiply it - because high school kids have a tendency to soap box themselves and try to act older than they are, and sadly, wiser than they are. News Flash Hun, you're young. If your elder speaks, listen. Quietly. Chances are they have a lot more world experience than you do. 5) Perhaps the mother disrespects the child and the child has given her no reason not to trust her beside, gasp, learning about her sexuality. This mother seems to be overprotective, untrusting and unrespectful of her daughter. Good that YOUR (note the correct spelling of the word) mother instilled "her house her rules" but good for this OP for living her own life. Snooping doesn't equal love, it equals disrespect. So to recap. Learn to spell and type correctly if you want people to take you seriously. If you are going to lie or fib about your age and schooling, be consistent. And, of course, CHILL OUT.
4evanucks 0
woooow...WTF buddy?? Didn't u read the sign? NO FUKIN FREAKS ALLOWED...oh n u mite wanna consida chillin out too!
IndieApathy 21
Monkey Speaks Much Sense. Hurrah on that! :)
jvfernan 0
watch out guys... FML is serious business... oh and LOL @ #6
jouhou 0
ALLERGY TESTS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY
liquidpaper 0
Hey, you can vote for both "I agree" and "you deserved it" I agree, because your mom should have confronted you about it and not been all behind-your-back sneaky. You deserved it, because you fell for her silly excuse. Allergies aren't tested via urine!
TheAntiComment 0
shit for all you know, your mom submitted it for a drug test
pamberry 0
there is no way #6 isn't a troll that was hilarious
mcrstp 0
are you kidding me? you don't test allergies with urine! that should've been your first clue.