Today, my mother, her fiancé, and I were having dinner together. My mother was joking that she wasn't sure she could hold him down, as he used to "get around." She turned to talk to the waiter and my future step-father looked me up and down and winked. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML
Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really like. He brought up that there was a person staring at us from a nearby table. That person was my mom. FML
Today, my fiancé and I visited his family for dinner. The entire time I was there, his mother and sister had an in depth conversation about how attractive his ex girlfriends were and how they got along with them so well. FML
Today, my boyfriend was taking me to dinner to meet his parents. As we pulled into the restaurant valet, I saw a woman in a slutty dress and hooker heels get out of the car ahead of us. I jokingly asked if we had accidentally pulled into a strip club, pointing at the woman. It was his mother. FML
Today, I nervously introduced my mother to my new boyfriend. I had to sit and watch her flirt with him for an hour. When I took her in the other room and confronted her about it, she said, "Don't you dare ruin this for me!" FML
Today, my mother invited me to a nice restaurant to meet her boyfriend whom she's been seriously dating for a month. Imagine my surprise when she led me to a table and my boyfriend's father stood up, shocked, to greet me. Rather than being horrified, she is now planning double dates every week. FML
Today, my fiancé and I met his mother for lunch to discuss wedding plans. When we got there, I went to the bathroom to wash my hands. I heard a woman talking on her cell phone in the stall about her son's "disgusting, slutty girlfriend." The toilet flushed and my future mother-in-law walked out. FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML
Today, my mother arranged for me to meet the man she is planning to marry. Turns out, my future stepfather is also my creepy old boss, who spent 4 months hitting on me before I quit a year ago. FML
Today, I went to my fiancé's mother's funeral. His step-sister proudly announced that she's pregnant with his baby and they are engaged. FML
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Top comments
Monkeysmommy1 0
Dirty... Step daddy likes to keep it in the family.
m1k30d 6
You should make some kind of epic objection at the wedding.
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Comments (144)
KVKdragon 26
Tell your mom if you care that much. If your future stepdad is going to marry your mom, she should know what he does when she isn't looking. He shouldn't be visually feeling up other women, let alone you, his future stepdaughter /:|
lmaoatall 6
If he had winked and quietly said giggidy, I would say you would be really screwed. But since it was just a wink, you should be fine.
Gfrigo 1
She might miss and he might think she's trying to play footsies with him.
ieatunicorn4fun 7
Good idea
BradenLock 4
This exact same thing happened to a friend of mine, but the guy was joking around with them. I hope to hell that OPs guy was kidding too :/
jizzwold 21
Satanist...
perdix 31
Is he hot? Older men can be very sexy and can give you mind-blowing orgasms that younger guys can't because of their lack of experience and control. You ought to give him a try. I'm perdix, and I approve this message ;)
rifletwirler92 15
That's messed up.
perdix 31
Only if you are close-minded and don't like supreme pleasure. ;) ;)
PElexander 5
Every time I read a Perdix comment I crack the hell up. He sooo true in a hilarious way.
rifletwirler92 15
But that's her future stepfather, there has to be boundaries in some places.
perdix 31
You'd think there would be, but the mom knows he's a horndog and her daughter is hot, yet she's still willing to risk it.
nikkig12 0
Agreed! Older men are fantastic at mind blowing orgasms!
stewie13_666 0
I believe you meant having dinner. Not have
LennyComa 39
Just tell him he is a creep and he ain't gettin any and if he looks at you and winks again you will break his balls with a bowling ball
ladiesman219 4
hes had the old cow, now he wants the young calf.
japtch 15
Stepbrothers
KateWesley44 0
ah, the classic pedo-stepdad. just kick him in the nuts & scowl back.