Today, I nervously introduced my mother to my new boyfriend. I had to sit and watch her flirt with him for an hour. When I took her in the other room and confronted her about it, she said, "Don't you dare ruin this for me!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was hanging with my boyfriend. When his mom came to pick him up, he introduced me. She talked to me politely and I thought we hit it off very well. As I was walking away, I heard her say, "That's your new girlfriend? Honey, you could do so much better." FML
Today, my mother invited me to a nice restaurant to meet her boyfriend whom she's been seriously dating for a month. Imagine my surprise when she led me to a table and my boyfriend's father stood up, shocked, to greet me. Rather than being horrified, she is now planning double dates every week. FML
Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML
Today, I had to explain to my mother that it's inappropriate to hit on my boyfriend when his parents are over for dinner. FML
Today, my mother met my boyfriend. She thought it would be appropriate to tell him that he looks just like my ex-husband. FML
Today, I introduced my mother to my new girlfriend. My mom made a very nasty comment about her in Spanish, not realizing that my girlfriend teaches Spanish at the local school. FML
Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently, my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she's embarrassed of my real brother. FML
Today, I was introducing my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. I meant to say, "Mom, Dad, this is Tom." Instead, I said, "Mom, Dad, this is Mom." My boyfriend is now jokingly reconsidering our relationship, and my parents won't stop making fun of me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
FFML_314 12
Wow! That is creepy.
guiltypleasure12 0
cougar mommy? possibly creeper mommy? definitely
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (205)
FFML_314 12
Wow! That is creepy.
Ali_Br_fml 33
if he flirted back, he's not worth keeping. smh moms these days!!! Keep it in your pants cougar!!! (I wish my post would just show up already... stupid iPod.)
Dont_Explain 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
So here's what you do: Next time you have a family dinner, flirt with your dad for an hour and then ask him out on a date. if your parents have broken up, **** him on camera.
schwancy 2
Are you suggesting she flirt with her own father? That's twisted. I don't even want to think what you were suggesting with the, "**** him on camera" comment.
ashboust 0
68. I don't know what you get up to with your father, but for most people.. that's pretty sick!
TheWhiteDemon 0
solution: tell mom hes gay.
Dragons_corner 6
61 wait she should keep it imbued pants I thought it was keep your legs crossed? has everyone been lieing to me about what ladys got? or they have both? or I'm stupid? uh I'm going with G
xoxo_Becky_xoxo 0
Is 68 speaking from expierence? :O
singaman96 0
#1 is an understatement....
cantfightfate 0
obviously 68 Is joking. it's not hard to figure that out.
IAmRoot 0
It probably didn't happen. The OP is direct quoting from the video "Home Base."
Randen_fml 0
you should of said dibs!!
TransitionCovery 0
13th again to reply to this comment bitches!
Anaxes 5
#87 - Imbued pants? What does magical trousers have to do with this FML? Is the mum going to unleash a fireball on the OP if she ruins it for her?
chrishansen 0
"I don't even want to think what you were suggesting with the, '**** him on camera' comment." It is pretty self explanatory. PLease have a seat over there.
MrFerret 0
ummmm sharing is caring :)
iownyou676 0
please be joking 87
KianaSixx 0
BAHAHAHAHA
sassington10 0
thats awkward... and it sucksss
raymel 5
rotfl!!!!! a FML that actually made me laugh :) rare pleasure.
smlz4me 1
her own dad?? WTF?!?!?
ConradDavid 1
that's the most ****** up idea ever dude...
jBordeniv 0
156 wins
juicypu55y 0
Kinda like your face..
Faiths28 12
Cougar! Meow
paid2think 0
Mom's spittin more game than you!
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
"Spittin' game" is one of the worst euphemisms ever.
krazygirl100 9
no ur face is oh
krazygirl100 9
lol
guiltypleasure12 0
cougar mommy? possibly creeper mommy? definitely
skreech96 0
HA
Xavi89 0
haha!
xoCOURTNIEox 0
slap your mom In the face & say bitch your looking as old as a raisin & then go have sex with your bf in front of her :) problem solved
starile 20
109: YES. sorry, op, that your mom is a stupid bitch.
tikimuppet 11
But did he flirt back?
laughing_atyou 0
No duhhh! It went on for an hour and then the OP HAD to pull her mom into another room.
six6six6six6 0
If you're going to use someone else's picture, at least make sure there's no giant copyright symbol in the middle of it.
JrPeru14 0
Lmfaoo copyright :P
C00k13monster 16
The picture you used, her head is at such a weird angle looks like her neck broke ?
Alesana_Love 0
Your mom will rape him in his sleep!!
ozkalukaas 0
it's not rape If you say "Surprise"
BethiiGeex 0
lol 160 :L xD
julz10 0
next time she brings home someone... payback time for you
appleapple 0
milf ?
Jessi2487 0
OP your mom is an animal.... thats just cold. she's a cold bitch. like a dog with no home in the winter. smack the s*** outta her. i would never do that to my mom tho.... jus sayin =)
l6de7w 0
OMg I say OP too!
Marvin_Android 0
Sounds disgusting, much like anything else sexual that involves your disgusting, ape-like species. You should just stop caring. Everything you do comes to nothing anyway. Pursuing happiness, however fleeting, will inevitably leave you emptier than before. And of course, the beings whom you think care for you end up hurting you the most. Just like your mother is trying to. Life. Don't talk to me about life.
kappaaa 12
Your an idiot. She didn't even talk to YOU about life. So give her a break. **** man
FFML_314 12
Irony. Sweet, sweet irony. I missed you.
schwancy 2
I think he's pretending to be a robot...
kappaaa 12
#27 I think he's a dick.
Trollz4daLULZ 2
#27, I think you are mistaken. We should give this guy the benefit of the doubt. After all, I'm a real giraffe. #21: *you're #26: if you missed irony so much, then you can stoppy cookingy and leavey the kitcheny for a few minutes and go to the irony board and pressy some clothes.
ChromeDome 5
Dude, that last one doesn't even make any sense, no matter what cheap puns you're trying to get across.
FFML_314 12
Oh wow, 36. Facepalm.
uncleyuggles 0
calm down he's just a troll
Trollz4daLULZ 2
DOUBLE FACEPALM! ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE FML! WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!?!?! [btw, that's the worst video EVER made, and if it amuses you, you need to die kthxbye]
iSitt 0
I loved Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy But I never saw the BBC series so your Marvin pic looks weird.
Marvin_Android 0
I'm sorry. I don't mean to bring anyone down. I knew you wouldn't like hearing the truth; people seldomly do. The more you know, the more depressed you get. I'm actually surprised so many of you have read what I've said. Maybe there's hope for your species yet. You might want to see Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz soon, though. Not that it will do you any good. He'll probably just read you some of his poetry and kick you off his ship. And you won't want that on your mind while he carries out his orders. Life. Don't talk to me about life.
schwancy 2
Can a robot be truly sorry? I thought they were Incapable of emotion.
kappaaa 12
#55 'You species'? Your ******* retarded dude. Go into the real world and get laid and cheer the **** up!
MissGrinch 4
D: Whaat? WALL-E has emotions!
Marvin_Android 0
58: quite capable. In fact, I think you ought to know that I'm feeling very depressed. 62: Actually, I said "your species", but you just eradicated any hope I had for it, both with your misquote and by saying "your ******* retarded" instead of "you're ******* retarded". You have just demonstrated the utter futility of your local education system. Not that it matters, though. Everything else in the universe is just as pointless. Life. Don't talk to me about life.
FFML_314 12
Kappaa, when are you going to stop being so damn stupid?
xxpanicxx69 3
Marvin I love you!
klutzycleo 5
^^ WIN!
kappaaa 12
#66 Yo dick. How am I the 'Stupid' one? **** stick.
kappaaa 12
Bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. You all make me laugh.
FFML_314 12
She still hasn't figured out why she was stupid to begin with.
hateplow 3
you hooked a big one Marvin. well played sir. well played indeed.
firecopy 6
kappaaa has gone crazy. my advice is that she goes back to real life, figure out HER STUPID MISTAKE, and cry over it while making me a sammich. oh btw, all robots have feelings. ex, Walle, Goddard, and c3po.
luna4545 4
I would bet you $300 that u play dungeons and dragons.. just saying. for real dude get a life and get out of your parents basements. this whole I'm a robot thing will never get u laid..
FFML_314 12
Robots don't need to get laid, nor do they have parents.
RedPillSucks 33
Isn't it difficult to continue a joke on people who simply don't get it? It's like explaining Romeo and Juliet to people who've never had serious love in their lives. I guess there's always the enjoyment of pointing and laughing.
squad81 0
every FML I see has at least one argument in the comments. -_-
SarahBearXoX 0
Kappaaa, please stop now. I'm feeling embarassed for you.
Radi0Waves 0
Everyone who doesn't get this needs to pick up a copy of Douglas Adams' Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy..... Seriously, people, READ A BOOK!
nycy 0
Stupid is a relative term. It cannot be proven nor disproven. What is stupid to one may not be stupid to another. For example, 17th and 18th Europeans thought the natives of America to be barbarous and "stupid"but the natives saw themselves at the pinnacle of knowledge. Just because one doesn't get a joke is no reason to consider someone dumb. Or stupid as you put it.
Bob87_fml 0
There is actually some truth to what the robot says...
iownyou676 0
42
SarahMarie83 0
Maybe kappaaa is just feeling less than froody because she lost her towel. I always know where my towel is.
michael666 7
most stupid people think that they are smart.... not saying indians and stupid, they were brilliant, and in my eyes, more civilized.