Today, my mother found out that I'm sexually active. She wants me to tell my father. I'm seventeen, and my father still has trouble grasping the fact that I carry a purse, because it means I'm "growing up." This should be fun. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML
Today, I went to the doctor with my parents. When the doctor asked if I was sexually active, I said 'Yes.' My mom laughed and said 'Good one.' My dad, for added effect said, 'Your hand doesn't count.' FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML
Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
Today, I told my parents I'm pregnant. I got a long lecture from my mom about using protection. It would have been fine hearing all that, but I'm turning 22, I moved out a few years ago, have a full time job with great benefits, and am getting married next summer. FML
Today, I finally had the guts to tell my mom about her boyfriend hitting on me. Not only did she not care, but she got mad at me. I'm 15. FML
Today, I'm in 12th grade and came home from school to find out my mother had someone over to have sex while I was at school. She's not had sex my whole life, so the uncomfortable feeling it gave me is different than anything I've felt before. She's been single by the way. FML
Today, I told my mother that I'm pregnant. She went off screaming at me about how I shouldn't be having sex. I am 25 and have been happily married for 3 years. FML
Today, my mom is 44 years-old, and she is cheating on my dad with my friend who is 19. And she's paying me to keep her secret. FML
Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with my boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
Rambo881xx 0
Show him a tampon, he will have a heart attack.
westsidewhite 0
daddys little girl :D
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Comments (238)
kemolegend907 0
YDI for having under-aged sex...*****
smile_upon_me 0
I agree with 131. I'm 18, but I lost my virginity at 16. I don't think this makes me a **** since I have only been with my boyfriend. And from the sound of this, the OP has only been with her boyfriend/partner as well. As long as she is safe and doesn't sleep around with every Tom, Dick, and Harry, I think the "ydi because you're a ****" comments should stop.
etzelryan 0
that sucks ha
Staciii 0
awe the typical dad that has a hard time letting go...sucks for you op.
gabriellemv 5
why the eff is it any of your dad's business?! wow.
GGTM0710 0
155 I personally think u r a COMPLETE ass, and I hope other people agree with me. killed pets, miscarrages, ect. is NEVER funny
NYCJohnJay22 0
people should not be telling when u should have sex, your dad is not going to kill you, he can not change what happened , he would just have to face the facts and forgive you at some point.
shot4 0
at least wait till after you done with your schooling and have a good job...so just in case you do have a baby you can support it
angtaffe 0
good luck with that op!
picturescrazy 24
Wow, and I thought my dad was overprotective o.o