Today, my mom took me to dinner. She told me about an argument that she and her boyfriend had, and she showed me the texts. While reading, I learned that she smells his dick before sucking it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother's boyfriend sent me pictures of my mom sucking him off. FML
Today, I found out that my mum has been texting my ex-boyfriend to tell him what a dick he is. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML
Today, I found my boyfriend making out with my mom. FML
Today, I realized all of my boyfriend's and my dirty messages were being sent to my mom because I'd logged into messenger on her phone once without logging out. She sat me down and said, "I know your mouth's been on his wee wee." FML
Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML
Today, my mom and I had a fight in the car over who farted. The result? She wanted to smell my underwear when we got home, to prove it was me. FML
Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
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Top comments
jdizz16 16
Does she kiss you with that mouth? Yuck!
zandalee 20
God I have learnt more weird sex fetish behavior on FML this week than ever before! Keep up the good work everyone!!
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Comments (143)
perdix 31
Have you noticed that she smells you before kissing you? Now you will ;)
3rdbass 9
A double post? The first joke must not have had the impact you wanted. I'm disappointed, Perdix.
yoursucklives 36
he does this all the time. i don't see a problem with it. if he thought of another comment, why not post it?
linkinpark98 24
If I were you, I'd stick to a friendly hug from now on, OP. You don't really want those lips on you.
JoeParris 1
I'm pretty sure her mom has smelled and sucked a lot more dicks than just her boyfriends!
RedPillSucks 33
Erm... that would make linkinpark98 comment even more apropos
sillysh 0
Casually puts the phone down and walks away>.> an image I'd never want to picture.
jojimugo 20
Yea your going to need a number of a good shrink
onelove858 5
That's the power of pine sol baby
bombardtower 1
That's a good thing. At least she knows what she is getting in to.
OffToTheGayBar 9
You mean "what's getting into her".
fighterofwar 5
He just needs to shower more..
armybudd0311 0
Gross...
tne201992 12
Someone lost their appetite!
erinchick1 7
I'd be freakin' out if I were you. That is something I would never want to know about my mother. You shouldn't get involved with her relationship unless he starts to get physical with her then you punch his fucken lights out.
bmkc4 1
I bet that is a hell of a mental picture