Today, my mom took me to dinner. She told me about an argument that she and her boyfriend had, and she showed me the texts. While reading, I learned that she smells his dick before sucking it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mother's boyfriend sent me pictures of my mom sucking him off. FML
Today, I found out that my mum has been texting my ex-boyfriend to tell him what a dick he is. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML
Today, I found my boyfriend making out with my mom. FML
Today, I realized all of my boyfriend's and my dirty messages were being sent to my mom because I'd logged into messenger on her phone once without logging out. She sat me down and said, "I know your mouth's been on his wee wee." FML
Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML
Today, my mom and I had a fight in the car over who farted. The result? She wanted to smell my underwear when we got home, to prove it was me. FML
Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
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Top comments
jdizz16 16
Does she kiss you with that mouth? Yuck!
zandalee 20
God I have learnt more weird sex fetish behavior on FML this week than ever before! Keep up the good work everyone!!
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Comments (143)
MissSmileyFace 0
You know what they say, "smelling enhances the taste buds." :)
RedPillSucks 33
Ok, I admit to being naive. Do chicks regularly test what their mans dick smells like? How would they know if some other chick is also giving her man a ******** (earlier)? Just because he smells a little different down there doesn't mean he's cheating, right? He could have just used a different brand of soap. I'ma take some notes so I don't get tripped up getting my next ********. I always wondered why she had a knife close by.
eyecon502 13
So you learned something today? Always smell something before you put it in your mouth.
jaredofmo 22
"Why you coming home five in the mone Somethings going on can I smell yo dick? Don't play me like a fool cause dat ain't cool So what you need to do is let me smell yo dick" Sorry. That was instantly what came to mind. Darn Tosh.0.
KiddNYC1O 22
Lmao. That song.
Hockeyboy4280 18
Is your mom Aviance, and is he coming home at 5 in the morn? Cause something's going on... And your mom shouldn't be played for a fool, because that ain't cool.
emilydenisee 0
hahha lemme smell yo diick
jay1225 6
At least you know she's sucking clean **** lmao
getsleazyFML 2
That is really gross
NayrGuy 0
Sounds like she learned that tip from tosh.0
Mauskau 36
Well you smell things before they go in your mouth if they have a strong smell, nothing wrong with it. Plus if a dick smells horrible you don't want it anywhere near your mouth, otherwise, yum yum, leftover piss!
SmittyJA24 26
Certain things don't belong in any mother--daughter bonding conversation. ... Makes me glad to be a guy....