Today, my mom took me to dinner. She told me about an argument that she and her boyfriend had, and she showed me the texts. While reading, I learned that she smells his dick before sucking it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother's boyfriend sent me pictures of my mom sucking him off. FML
Today, I found out that my mum has been texting my ex-boyfriend to tell him what a dick he is. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML
Today, I found my boyfriend making out with my mom. FML
Today, I realized all of my boyfriend's and my dirty messages were being sent to my mom because I'd logged into messenger on her phone once without logging out. She sat me down and said, "I know your mouth's been on his wee wee." FML
Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML
Today, my mom and I had a fight in the car over who farted. The result? She wanted to smell my underwear when we got home, to prove it was me. FML
Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
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Top comments
jdizz16 16
Does she kiss you with that mouth? Yuck!
zandalee 20
God I have learnt more weird sex fetish behavior on FML this week than ever before! Keep up the good work everyone!!
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Comments (143)
Alan2 24
You can never be too careful.
Ajwc101 24
I can't imagine how disturb you are. Hope it didn't scar you for life.
igive 29
i believe we all have an over-active imagination when we least want it to be.
suckmylife669 0
Smell first, suck later!
stewy133 10
Why would you read your moms sext messages?
peachesncreem 21
OP read them by accident while reading the text arguement. I doubt it was on purpose if OP felt FML about it.
peachesncreem 21
Oh my.. Holy-delayed-reaction-Batman! I meant *argument :)
stewy133 10
Wow I don't know why I thought she was reading sexy messages. I guess I read the post to fast. Yeah you're right. :p
sparklethelette 6
Well yeah, gotta make sure it's clean before you commit to a full bj. Don't wanna get stuck awkwardly trying to hold ur breath from cheese dick for a half hour.
MakeTodayADTR 20
Was it awkward when she commented on how good the food smelled? xD
ihaveFMLfeverr 5
Well did he come home at 5 in the mornn?
perdix 31
I'll bet your dad's none too happy to learn about this. How much sniffing are we talking about? It is customary to run a fine cigar under your nose a few times before putting it in your mouth. I'd guess the rules are the same regardless of what you are smoking, whether it be a cigar or a pole.
dellis44 7
you'll never see her the same way again. awkward
yoursucklives 36
nobody wants to hear something about their parents sex life, sorry OP