Today, my mom told me she spent $760 on "quantum pendants" that "produce scalar energy that helps to enhance the body’s biofield." When I told her she got scammed, she denied it and yelled at me. Best part? She frequently lectures me about how I waste my money and spend irresponsibly. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom blew her top when I casually mentioned that it's pretty well known that the story of Jesus is a retelling of older Persian and Egyptian stories. She then went on to yell at me that I wasted my money on college and "book learning". FML
Today, I found out my mom has literally spent all her savings sending money to some bullshit-peddling megachurch televangelist, who apparently told her that giving them money would ensure her future fortune. Tithings, my ass. FML
Today, my mom told me that I needed to manage my spending better. This is the same woman who will log onto Candy Crush Saga, play a level and not come remotely close to beating it, and then blow $20+ on it to complete it. She got just a tad angry when I pointed out this hypocrisy. FML
Today, my mother took 350 dollars from savings to go to a psychic. But it's okay though, because now I know I'm an "ancient soul from another dimension". An "ancient soul" who now has no money. FML
Today, my mother flipped out that I spent $20 on a gift for myself for my birthday. Instead of getting a gift for me, she spent $300 on a new vacuum cleaner, and claims that we didn't have enough left in our budget to spend on me. FML
Today, my mom started dipping into my college savings, just so she can continue throwing money away on visiting a medium who claims she can channel the spirit of our recently-deceased family dog. FML
Today, I bought my mother an expensive TV she had been looking at. After I bought it, she continued browsing for more stuff. I told her I couldn't afford the extra items. She got mad and called me "selfish". FML
Today, my mother started nagging me for spending $500 on a guitar, stating that, "We're not in the mood for unnecessary bullcrap." I paid for it with MY money, and she suddenly turned up at MY house because my father kicked her out of their house after finding out that she cheated on him. FML
Today, my mom stole my holiday money because she found it “near her bag” in my kitchen and “assumed it was hers” and she must have “forgotten it was in there all this time.” I demanded it back, but she’d already spent it on hair, nails, shoes, and a date night with dad. She won’t pay me back either. FML
Today, I found out that the $200 I reluctantly gave to my mother so she could rent a house was paid to a scammer. Now she wants to live with me, in my one bedroom apartment. FML
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Top comments
cprompt 0
Dude, those quantum pendants are dangerous. I got one and now I randomly phase between the universe and an alternate one.
zoopooz 0
Your mom is duuuuuuuuuuuuuumb. Kill her.
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Comments (118)
acid_burn_fml 0
@ number 19 and 20, im bullshitting you guys. His mom is ridiculous.
elloelle 0
no man, that was awesome. duh it was total bullshit! i was just shocked! hahahaha!
secretish 0
How is this an FML?? It has nothng to do with your life
secretish 0
How is this an FML??? It doesnt really have anything to do with your life.
PTERONOPHOBIA 0
No way, your mom yelled at you? **** YOUR LIFE
Neenertastic 0
i think it's an FML to have a crystal-healing new age hippie mom...i would know...i have one, too...it's kind of like the retarded version of having a god-fearing bible thumping mom who thinks the devil is tempting you...
Chocolate_Chunk 2
the retarded version? how is believing in a mighty invisible old guy in the sky (who ****** a human to give birth to himself just so he can kill himself to provide a way to circumwent a rule he himself made) who made a winged warrior that was able to betray him despite his all-knowingness and was later sent down underground to an invisible, quite hot place just to hunt for a non-observable, non-proveable energy thing in your body any less stupid? Just because lots of people believe the latter doesn't make it not retarded
HAHAURLIFESUX 0
It's a FML because his mom yells at him for spending his money irresponsibly, probably on cds or dvds or whatever then goes out and spends 700 on some BS neck crystal.
secretish 0
still not an FML
sirfuzzitoes 0
today, i was reading FML and realized that there are too many morons out there that don't understand the concept of FML. FML. see? isn't that stupid, don't post things that are irrelevant and/or not actually FML stories. lesson over.
amirn86 0
Yeah this is FHL for either being A. incredibly stupid or B. incredibly stubborn Let us know if the biofield crystals work