Today, my mom told me she spent $760 on "quantum pendants" that "produce scalar energy that helps to enhance the body’s biofield." When I told her she got scammed, she denied it and yelled at me. Best part? She frequently lectures me about how I waste my money and spend irresponsibly. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom blew her top when I casually mentioned that it's pretty well known that the story of Jesus is a retelling of older Persian and Egyptian stories. She then went on to yell at me that I wasted my money on college and "book learning". FML
Today, I found out my mom has literally spent all her savings sending money to some bullshit-peddling megachurch televangelist, who apparently told her that giving them money would ensure her future fortune. Tithings, my ass. FML
Today, my mom told me that I needed to manage my spending better. This is the same woman who will log onto Candy Crush Saga, play a level and not come remotely close to beating it, and then blow $20+ on it to complete it. She got just a tad angry when I pointed out this hypocrisy. FML
Today, my mother took 350 dollars from savings to go to a psychic. But it's okay though, because now I know I'm an "ancient soul from another dimension". An "ancient soul" who now has no money. FML
Today, my mother flipped out that I spent $20 on a gift for myself for my birthday. Instead of getting a gift for me, she spent $300 on a new vacuum cleaner, and claims that we didn't have enough left in our budget to spend on me. FML
Today, my mom started dipping into my college savings, just so she can continue throwing money away on visiting a medium who claims she can channel the spirit of our recently-deceased family dog. FML
Today, I bought my mother an expensive TV she had been looking at. After I bought it, she continued browsing for more stuff. I told her I couldn't afford the extra items. She got mad and called me "selfish". FML
Today, my mother started nagging me for spending $500 on a guitar, stating that, "We're not in the mood for unnecessary bullcrap." I paid for it with MY money, and she suddenly turned up at MY house because my father kicked her out of their house after finding out that she cheated on him. FML
Today, my mom stole my holiday money because she found it “near her bag” in my kitchen and “assumed it was hers” and she must have “forgotten it was in there all this time.” I demanded it back, but she’d already spent it on hair, nails, shoes, and a date night with dad. She won’t pay me back either. FML
Today, I found out that the $200 I reluctantly gave to my mother so she could rent a house was paid to a scammer. Now she wants to live with me, in my one bedroom apartment. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
cprompt 0
Dude, those quantum pendants are dangerous. I got one and now I randomly phase between the universe and an alternate one.
zoopooz 0
Your mom is duuuuuuuuuuuuuumb. Kill her.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (118)
MTF23 0
Funny.. but not FML. Your mom's just a moron.
Tiwuz 19
That's why their life is ******, their mom is a moron...
CaptainObvious_fml 0
#6....ROFL and yeah your mom isn't too smart
RitzyHoke 0
It's a common thing for adults to do.
MJC84 0
Tell your mom she is a ******* asshole. Because she clearly is.
Omgwtfnoway 0
Ironic but not really FML worthy.
Carribu 0
lmfao @ #6 I can see why he's calling this a FML but it's not much of one.
babydoll86_fml 0
Hahaha omg that's hilarious. Sucks so much that parents are soooo hypocritical and if we dare mention it, we get yelled it. But it's ok for them to do that to us. Can't wait to be a parent and screw up my own kids :P
babydoll86_fml 0
And #6, I lol-ed in real life. You are awesome :D
acid_burn_fml 0
Do not mess with the you biological aura, nickname: biofield. The cosmic rays foretold that this will lead to impending doom and/or constipation. This is not a surprise, the winds told me this would happen. But for the sake of your mother you need to negate the negative emissions of those quantum pendants. What i suggest you do is find yourself some crystalized shards of Namarian Chrysalis ($1043.99 @ amazon), remember that to negate the pendants you must harvest them on the third day of a waning moon.
elloelle 0
^ wwwwttttffff???? haha! sorry your mom likes to be gay about things.