Today, my mom explained the benefits of douching to me with my boyfriend right there. He began arguing with her about how the vagina is usually self-cleaning. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML
Today, my mom took me to dinner. She told me about an argument that she and her boyfriend had, and she showed me the texts. While reading, I learned that she smells his dick before sucking it. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, hanging out with him and his mom. I had to do a number two. A while later, we hear his mom in the washroom. She had turned on the bathtub and was flushing the toilet. A lot. Later on, my boyfriend leaves the room and she says, “Did you make that mess in the toilet?” FML
Today, I found out that boyfriend doesn't think he needs to wipe his ass after he shits if he's going straight in the shower because he can just "clean it up in there". We share a loofah. FML
Today, I was explaining the inner parts of a vagina and how they work. To my boyfriend. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom in the bathroom, washing a dildo. FML
Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML
Today, I had my boyfriend come over for dinner for the first time. It was all going well until my dad started explaining to my boyfriend how to use toilet paper. He even demonstrated it. FML
Today, I actually had to have a discussion with my boyfriend about why he should shower more than once a week. FML
Today, without thinking, I casually advised my mum that the best way to get the piping nozzle clean is to 'fingerfuck' it. FML
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Top comments
mfinn 0
I agree with your boyfriend.
iamazombie 0
wow poor you, your boyfriend is smart and open to talking about sex. your life sucks -.-
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Comments (63)
lucifer69_fml 0
if your sister is a gynocologist why can't you spell it
theluckyones 10
Cause her sister is a gynecologist not a teacher.
noPENGSinALASKA 0
cause her sister is the one with a doctorine... not her
sallybobally 0
they sell cigarettes too, dude. just because something is for sale doesnt make it safe. even if they are safe, (which they arent) they are not necessary. your ****** should smell like ******, not summer rain or whatever. if it smells bad, like foul or fishy , thats evidence of a problem, which means you ought to go to the doctor.
laurendrew 2
Summer rain? hahah
jmateo_95 0
that mom is the ****** boss
FYLorYDIohno 12
how he knows so much about vaginas ? makes you wonder....
S3A82 0
cuz you learn that shit in 5th grade sex ed...
poopberry 0
I'm just commenting so I can use the word douche. douche.
bolek 0
lmaooooo!!!!!! I was about to comment that!! lmAo douch!
Galbatorix 0
Your a douche;)
supmofukka 0
its true. ur bf knows wats up. dont be embarrassed guys actually kno alot about womens health esp. whats supposed to go on down there.
gatorgrl1988 0
# 22 your mother needs a slap on the face for fouling the earth with a dumb shit like you. my sister is the doctor not me. Ans it spelled it like that on my Droid. :)
BeeBabyee420 0
wow so much anger....and so ridiculous the bottom line here is that if you take proper care of yourself, you shouldn't have to douche. it's really that fkn simple. the only girls I have ever known that are smelly in the pants are girls that (for example) don't take a damn shower after girl's atheletics or screw around a lot and just sit in their juices without bathing....yeah; once again-it comes down to bathing regularly. have a stinky vagine? try lettin so nice hot water get to your shit every once in awhile.
tannarox 0
you spelled like that yourself, you douche. :P
audi00 0
yea ur mom should tell u that in private