Today, my mom came home from surgery. Upon arriving home, she flashed a paper in my face and said, "Want to see pictures of my colon?" My eyes are still burning. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I showed my girlfriend some old home videos of me as a kid. My dad must have taped over one though, because halfway through it cut to extremely graphic footage of his colonoscopy. FML
Today, my mother sent a picture that was meant for her husband. I cannot unsee what I have seen. FML
Today, my mom showed my girlfriend a picture of me crying when I pooped in the bathtub. FML
Today, I am recovering from surgery, so even though my mom could burn cold water, I was forced to let her cook for me. Thanks to her cooking, I’ve now shit my body weight in brown water, and I need her help to get on the toilet. She doesn’t always get me there in time. FML
Today, my coworker showed me photos of her anal fissures. I'm not a doctor. FML
Today, I had debilitating stomach cramps and told my mom, but she said she was too tired to take me to the ER. I had appendicitis. Thanks Mom. FML
Today, after having horrific constipation the day before, I finally got the rock hard turd out of my system. Things got awkward as I cried out in pain and my mom asked me what was wrong. Realizing the dining room and kitchen was nearby, I said "Never mind, it's gross!" I think she figured it out anyways. FML
Today, I crawled into my mom's room to tell her my stomach was in massive pain. She ended up throwing me out of the room while spraying me with Lysol. My appendix was about to burst and I needed surgery. FML
Today, after 4 months of no family contact while deployed in the military, I receive an email from my mother. Attached was a picture of a toilet full of green shit, with a message from my mom saying, "Seen neon poo before? Thought I would share!" FML
Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Was she bending over and spreading her ass-cheeks open?
bbedlock_fml 7
Want to see my colon? :
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Comments (79)
DocBastard 40
I often take pictures when I do surgery, and I always ask the patients if they want a copy. I've also had patients ask me if they can keep their gall bladder or whatever organ I am in the mood to remove that day. I've even had a few patients ask me if they can keep their gall stones so they can make jewelry out of them. People are pretty ****** up.
Tdevonner 0
I dont have family history of cholelithiasis but ive seen sum pretty nifty stones come out n I always said id wanna keep mine lol...woah but like in a jar...not as jewlry..thats fucken grosslok
MerrikBarbarian 9
I worked with someone who made earrings from human teeth, but gallstones? That's a new level of weird even for me!
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
56 is mentally retarded, or a troll.
Tdevonner 0
or maybe i work in surgery and love it?
rubberduckie94 13
Wow! It does not take much to rattle your cage does it? I know it was your mom but come on its not that gross.
ICATiger 13
Kinky??
TreeStarOsaurus 0
Oh sedatives . . . Sounds like something my mother would do.
I_Punch_Babies 7
next time take a shit and photograph it. take it to your mom and go "want to see my last stool?"
Lulzinsky 3
Pics or it didn't happen
Snafuusmc 12
Seems like a deep dark abyss of evil I'm guessing.
wriptidez 0
just as long as u dont see her period
YukiRei 0
You can never unsee what you just saw.
misvenus000 4
Once my mom came home to show me pictures of her esophagus and stomach. I feel your pain.
ShyAnn29 15
Those pictures aren't really that bad!