Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I called the landlord about the mouse I keep seeing in my kitchen. He wasted no time accusing me of keeping it as a pet, and went off on me about his "No Pets" policy. FML
Snitches get snitches
Today, my roommate and I got charged $100 for having a cat in our apartment. I was only babysitting the cat so my neighbors wouldn't get caught and fined. We got caught because my roommate reported the people downstairs for having a noisy dog, so they reported that someone else in the building had a cat. FML
Today, after I moved into my college dorm three days ago, my roommate is still convinced that she is a cat. FML
Today, I have to wear earplugs in my own apartment because my neighbor won't turn down his music. My landlord doesn't believe me because "people with disabilities can't be rude." FML
Landlords gonna landlord
Today, my landlord came over while I wasn't home. My friend and her pets were thrown out by her husband. I'm the only person she knows in this state and she begged me to stay. I reluctantly told her fine; just don't answer the door. She did, with the animals, and told him she was living here. FML
Nice try, Janet
Today, I witnessed my psycho neighbor put her cat in a cage, cross into my backyard, and set the cage down before returning to her house. She then called the cops and claimed I'd stolen her cat. The cops didn't believe my side of the story for a second. FML
Today, I got several noise complaints from various neighbours about my "dog that won't stop barking". I don't own a dog, my neighbour owns the noisy dog. She sent me a complaint as well. FML
Roommate from Hell
Today, my extremely affectionate and docile cat, whom I love like a child and has never drawn blood, scratched my roommate of one day in the face while I was at work. She claims he just went ballistic, and I don't believe she's telling me everything. What the hell did she do to my cat? It's gonna be a long lease. FML
Fined
Today, my apartment complex added $250 to the $1,000 my roomate and I already owe because of an unauthorized pet and complaints from neighbors that our dog barks all night long. We don't have a dog, we don't even have a pet. FML
Mrs Heckles?
Today, my batshit crazy downstairs neighbor threatened me with "legal action" for making too much noise. According to her, it’s "illegal" for people in upstairs apartments to use vacuum cleaners, therefore I must sweep my carpets to avoid disturbing her and her imaginary guests. FML
Top comments
cardtowermaster 0
explain to him you have a natural uncontrollable tendency to purr when you're asleep. while explaining be sure to add some meows in between sentences
shanemaximo 7
Tell him you have some very, very strange sexual appetites and since you already make videos you would be happy to send him one.
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Comments (92)
uKNOuLOVEit 0
Ohh i do the same thing. ..Not.
kaykay20 0
Wow, couldn't he see their was no liter box or cat when he searched your apartment? If he didn't go inside then let him come inside and have a look for himself.
beebananaz88 0
Meowww.
perdix 31
Just show him your pussy and everything will be OK. With any skill, you'll never have to pay rent again.
Enslaved 38
Worked for me! Thanks for the great advice!(:
perdix 31
That's why momma called it your "moneymaker!" ;) Well done on using it for profit -- how's it going in the fun department?
Enslaved 38
Well, at first, my Russian Blue was a tad bit upset that I convert it into a Sphynx! But it's fine now! Lol
perdix 31
Don't know what to make of that. Maybe you can show me the ropes?
Enslaved 38
Show you the ropes? Do you think pussy likes S&M or something? Lol don't answer! I fear your reply! Hahahhaahaha
stevenmx86 8
I don't care. You deserve it for writing "animals was not allowed"...
rattusrattus 19
Look. I'm really sorry. But the gods command it!!!
rezzrhyme 0
i would let him do 1 surprise visit to prove u dont own a cat.
cntryiscntrywide 0
tell her, " yu stop that right meow! now when I come back meow, yu better stop going meow! "
IndigoAcrylic 9
Bitch please. It really dosn't take much effort to add the O to "YOU", does it "MEOW"? Hiss.
EvanescenceLuver 12
I have a friend who does that.
IndigoAcrylic 9
Cool story, bro ^_^
xSorry_fml 10
are you living with the "I love cats" girl?