Today, my husband threw out all of the spices in the cupboard. When I asked him why he said, "Our cat was named Spicy and I can't stand to look at them." Our recently deceased cat's name was Dicey. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband's cat died. He has resorted to calling me by her name to comfort himself. FML
Today, the cat climbed up to the spice shelf while I was cooking. As I looked up and told him to leave, he tipped over a chili container which coated my face with chili powder. The bloody pain in my eyes then made me knock over a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML
Today, I walked outside to see my dog killing my cat. My spouse tried to cheer me up - "Hey, at least we don't have to buy cat food anymore!" FML
Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML
Today, after my husband got ready for work, he touched my arm and slowly bent down. I assumed he was going to say he loved me and to have a good day. As I quickly thought of a loving response and prepared to give him a kiss, he whispered in my ear, "Did you put a dead mouse in the toilet?" Thanks a lot, cat. FML
Today, I awoke at two in the morning to my cat putting his most recent kill on my chest. When I jumped up screaming, the dead mouse went flying and now my husband and I can't find it. Better yet, now both my husband and my cat are giving me the silent treatment. FML
Today, since my husband has been volunteering to do more of the cooking, I was happy and relieved to have help, until every meal he made had an ungodly amount of spices in it. I overheard him on the phone, saying he’s been purposely making my food inedibly hot so that I’ll eat less and lose weight. FML
Today, on my way to Burger King I got into a heated discussion with my wife about our cats. We have 15 rescues, and I've reached my limit. Guess what came running up to my car while waiting in the drive-through. We named him Pickles. FML
Today, my husband is sulking because I wouldn't let him do what he's always wanted to do: throw our cat out the second floor window to see if she would land safely and on all fours. FML
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Top comments
xShannonxSammyx 7
So... FML I don't have any more spices, or FML my husband can't remember our dead cat's name?
RebornProblem 0
Was he high the entire lifetime of your cat?
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Comments (62)
broken_red_wagon 6
The most epic WTF moment :D
shakey1018 2
spicey and dicey are the dumbest names ive ever heard anyone call their cat....
BG_caligrown 0
lol
OL_What_FER 1
You were both wrong its name was icy!
mowmowlife 21
That makes me a little sad for your husband, but it's pretty funny and I don't know how much the name really matters, unless it does, to you. It can't have meant much to your cat. It's just nice that he cared for it to the point that he's willing to have bland meals for the next few months
Czech_Zidane 14
It would be funny if he thought that the cat's name was Dick :-)
caitiebug1119 15
Oh good grief, your life sucks on so many levels: 1) Your husband is an idiot who didn't know your cat's name, 2) Your idiotic husband apparently thinks you will never need a spice again in your life, 3) Your cat died, I know that hurts, 4) Once again, your husband is a big idiot, 5) A good chunk of his paycheck this month will go to refilling the spice cabinet, and 6) Once you tell him the cat's name was Dicey, you can't play any game with dice with him again. I am so sorry.
haleyliz1027 3
Oh God, my grandmother's name is Spicie.
doglover100 29
He needs his hearing checked.
MrHappyFaceV1 12
Hide the board games then