Today, my workplace replaced all of the toilets in the store with automatic toilets. I have an anxiety disorder, and I can't use them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was going to the bathroom at work. When I stood up, I noticed a little button on the side. I pressed it and the toilet flushed. I've worked there for nine months and just found out today that our toilets don't flush automatically. FML
Today, my new anxiety medicine fully entered my system. It makes me shit my brains out. I can either fart and risk shitting my pants every time or I can be too anxious to even enter a public place. FML
Today, I realized I'm too short to use the urinals at work. FML
Today, while at work I went to use the public restroom because I had a severe case of diarrhea. All went well until the timed sensor lights went off and I couldn't leave my stall to get them back on. I sat there for thirty minutes in pure darkness. FML
Today, at work, I did my morning constitutional and the automatic toilet died and wouldn't flush. I had to tell my boss, since there's only two toilets in the ladies' bathroom. So it's pretty obvious who dropped the duce. FML
Today, I really had to go to the bathroom. Due to my fear of public restrooms, I made sure it was clear before I started. I heard someone sigh halfway through. Embarrassed, I waited a full ten minutes before leaving the stall, only to see that it was only the automatic air freshener. FML
Today, I have horrible diarrhea because of IBS. If I was at home, this wouldn't be that big of an issue, but I'm at work and I don't have access to a bathroom all the time. I also found out I have about 10 minutes to get to the toilet or else I'll probably shit myself. FML
Today, our company not only installed standing desks, they have literally just spent a week replacing all our toilets, they are bizarre as hell with a seat that angles downwards. I looked them up online, they’re designed to cause pain in your legs to stop you sitting there too long. FML
Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML
Today, I desperately needed to pee, so I decided to confront my anxiety issues and use a public toilet. I opened the lid, only to see several huge, rancid floaters staring back at me. I had an attack, started sobbing, and pissed myself on the way home. Never again. FML
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Top comments
noonereally 6
If you're scared of a toilet I'm surprised you even have a job.
bleachedraven 14
🤣
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Comments (5)
cuz803 46
I'm sorry OP. I hope you conquer your anxiety. Do meds like zoloft help? Maybe try being creative and imagine the toilet being scared of you.
bleachedraven 14
🤣
BurnInDemonFire 39
This is a new one. I've never known anyone to have anxiety so bad they panic when the toilet flushes unexpectedly. I don't know if it's just been my own personal experiences, but I've yet to accidentally flush an automatic toilet. It usually doesn't happen until I've passed my hand over the sensor at a pretty close distance. But again, that may just be me.
Miss_Whipped 43
I had this sort of anxiety when I was younger. Even on long road trips if I came across automatic toilets, I would hold it until we went somewhere with a manual flush. Took me around 10 or so years to get over it. I usually try and opt for the toilet-paper-over-the-sensor option now if I have to. My anxiety surrounding it still exists but it isn't as severe.
Annies 20
In my case, automatic toilets don’t flush. At all. Even when I kick them repeatedly.
noonereally 6
If you're scared of a toilet I'm surprised you even have a job.