Today, my husband informed me that he recently slept with a secretary of his to become better at sex for me. I don't know what's worse, the fact that he cheated on me or that he seriously believes that he has a reasonable excuse. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband asked me for permission to have an affair with his hot secretary. FML
Today, my new husband of two weeks attempted to solicit sex from a hooker. He tried to excuse himself by saying, "I would never cheat on you! I was just looking." FML
Today, my husband of 35 years told me he had an affair with his secretary in 1995, when I was home with 3 preschoolers. At the time, the phone system required that the secretary pick up, so I was saying hello to her like a fool. I had no idea at the time. He would just come home and tell me how hard his job was. FML
Today, I found out my husband has been sleeping with one of the women in our marriage counselling group. FML
Today, I found out my husband of four years has been cheating on me with his boss, who had been kind and treated me well. I never suspected it until I caught them in OUR bed. All he would ever do was come home and complain about how hard his job was. I guess that wasn't the only thing that was hard. FML
Today, I found out why my husband is suddenly uninterested in sex. Apparently one of the secretaries at work has finally turned 18, and it's pretty much an open secret among his coworkers that they fuck anywhere from 2 to 5 times a day. FML
Today, while trying to be sexy for my fiancé by going to change his background photo to a naughty pic of myself, I found out he's been actively cheating on me. For almost a year, with multiple women. When confronted, he tried telling how hard me finding out was for HIM. FML
Today, my husband actually tried to pay me to forget about the affair that he's been having. FML
Today, I found out the love of my life, my husband, is cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, his response was, "Don't blame me, you're the gullible bitch." FML
Today, I came to found out that every time my husband told me that he was on "a work trip", he was actually cheating on me with some other bitch. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Mioko_fml 6
He got some guts to tell you he is cheating on you for you. Lmao. Honestly for you or not, cheater is a cheater, get rid of him.
rattusrattus 19
That makes no sense! To get better at sex with someone, you sleep with that person regularly and discuss what you both enjoy. I guess either your husband is a cheating git, or he's a cheating git who thinks female pleasure is all identical, in which case *clips OP's husband round the back of the head*
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (107)
HowAreYouToday 34
The question is: "Did it work?"
rhaemese 9
The answer is: "No."
Psych101 9
I really don't think that's the question, either.
MrBrightside21 20
I got caught cheating on my math test, and told the teacher "I was cheating so I could do better on the test, for you, Miss Henkelmire. " I got a zero on the test. Moral of the story: Don't cheat.
gc327072 31
47- "were".... So since you're 17, I'm guessing you dropped out?
DogsPaw 16
I graduated at 17, I went to the Local College and took extra classes.
letmehavemytea 21
Just because they're 17 doesn't mean they dropped out. I'm 17 and in university :) don't most people graduate at around ages 17-19?
shyeahh_fml 19
And some people graduate early.
hunteer9 5
There's someone in my college that is only 16
PhishloverA 14
#1, that excuse shouldn't work on anyone with a right mind because OP's husband should get better at sex by practicing on OP. Nobody should have to cheat to get better at sex when they have their spouses to practice on. It makes no sense and the person who cheats and also uses that excuse doesn't have any either
mowmowlife 21
Arguably not, hence the FML
melkymac101 17
See why don't u people ever listen to the guy. If he's better at sex...no harm done
Aratiti 8
And why would someone "inform" his spouse about this instead of keeping it a secret? Pretty much everything about this story is worst.
Codezlol 21
Regardless of how much of an airhead this guy sounds like, people tend to feel guilty when performing acts like adultery. Trying to hide stuff like that eats away at people if the have a heart.
rhaemese 9
Because I'm sure that OP's husband would rather have told her herself rather than for her to find out 5 years later when they have a gaggle of kids. That or he thought he would get in less trouble...
TomPusslicker 21
Another possibility is the threat of blackmail, and he just wanted to tell her before his secretary would.
annie_nk 23
Agree with #14. Seen it happen to a couple I used to live with. The girl who cheated became so guilt ridden, she was throwing up daily. Her boyfriend thought she was pregnant.
Mioko_fml 6
He got some guts to tell you he is cheating on you for you. Lmao. Honestly for you or not, cheater is a cheater, get rid of him.
AKGirlinSD 20
And, both are equally bad. His cheating and excuse are pathetic. Makes me wonder what his other excuses were before you two were together.
rattusrattus 19
That makes no sense! To get better at sex with someone, you sleep with that person regularly and discuss what you both enjoy. I guess either your husband is a cheating git, or he's a cheating git who thinks female pleasure is all identical, in which case *clips OP's husband round the back of the head*
gc327072 31
It makes total sense. To get better at battlefield 3, I kill people and drive tanks in my spare time.
SenselessPattern 12
Really? All I do to get better is borrow an AC-130 from my local airport. Much less effort involved, and twice the rewards.
gc327072 31
57- yeah, but it's always being used! I'm lucky if I can get in one once a week.
scrappy23 4
Sleep with one of his coworkers and then tell him with the same excuse.
Miss_Terri 2
Sorry, but that's a stupid and immature solution. 1) op will be stooping to his level, which is very low. 2) even at this age, STDs still happen 3) op's husband may actually be one of those wife-swapping fetish guys and it may turn him on 4) op's husband might not even give a shit.
scrappy23 4
24, Ever heard of sarcasm?
CuriousAlien 7
Well If you were being sarcastic, never mind with what I was going to say. Thank god for the edit button.
Miss_Terri 2
I perceived it more as a suggestion or joke of some kind, but if it was your attempt at sarcasm, well... sorry
scrappy23 4
Is it pick on Scrappy day or something miss terri?:(
gc327072 31
32- It's "get in a scrap with scrappy" day, actually.
Kiki242 19
And you're talking to a divorce lawyer right?
sebastianzz 4
Absolutely! You should divorce him. How disgusting.
Ozymandias_ 2
Well at least he tried, It would be worst if you caught him. I think he was just feeling guilty.
BellaBelle_fml 23
At least he tried?! He didn't just try, he succeeded…at being an imbecile of a cheater. I know you are just trying to look at the bright side, and I can appreciate that, but you failed to see the true bright side of this situation. Which would be that the OP is now informed of her husband's cheating ways and can now divorce and move on.
jvmb 0
Da fuq did I just read?
FlyinTurtle 7
Most original comment ever, I tip my hat off to you.
saIty 17
Today, my husband informed me that he recently slept with a secretary of his to "become better at sex for me." I don't know what's worse, the fact that he cheated on me or that he seriously believes that he has a reasonable excuse. FML Verbatim.
Missusluv313 9
Really, we should be asking you that question. Smfh.
flutter4 7
Lol 18! Good one!
KeannaLove 32
You're an idiot A. Because you didn't understand the FML and B. Because you said da fuq.
WritingWrongs 8
Oh, come on! Aren't we past this already? Enough crap people.
bach2121 13
What is wrong with society?
thewiseguy13 0
studys show the the number one problem with society is that it is largely made up of people.
mowmowlife 21
Hey, at least he was honest.
lilhellian 27
Awww isn't that romantic.. now on a serious note I do believe this is a case were either a consuler or a divorce will work.