Today, my grandmother saw me for the first time in years. "Not all your clothes have to be as tight as condoms, you tramp," is probably the nicest greeting she's ever given me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my grandmother doesn't wear underwear when she bent over in front of me in her inappropriately short nightgown. FML
Today, I saw my 89 year-old grandmother naked. She just moved in with us and apparently, she has an "open door policy." FML
Today, we spent the day with my grandmother. During a family conversation, my sweet little grandmother looked me up and down, and without any hesitation said, "I remember you being so beautiful," before looking at my mother, mouthing, "What happened?" and laughing. She's 87. FML
Today, we had my grandmother with dementia round for tea. She looked me up and down and said, very matter-of-factly, "Well, with a figure like that, no one will rape you." FML
Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML
Today, my grandmother refused to wear clothes. FML
Today, some idiot introduced my grandmother to yoga pants. FML
Today, my grandma was leaning over in front of me, vacuuming, while wearing a V-neck shirt. Out of instinct, I glanced at her chest. She's 75. I checked out my 75 year-old grandma. FML
Today, I took my grandma to the hospital to visit her estranged husband who she hasn't seen in years. After a thoroughly disasterous visit, we're waiting in the carpark and my gran strokes my face and tells me I have a lot of facial hair. I thought she was going to thank me. And I'm a girl. FML
Today, my grandmother ripped her pants. We all got a big view of her pink thong. FML
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Top comments
StanSmith_fml 9
Grandparents. They say the truth, even if it hurts.
Kajol123 5
At least she acknowledged you....unlike mine :/ baby steps, OP
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Comments (150)
NoOneCaresReally 8
Best insult I've heard for a while, might use that.
mizuki123 8
She sounds nice... At least you don't live with her or see her often. I had a friend who lives with her grandma that is not very nice,
crazycatloverr 7
Are you daft? How do you get 'nice' from that?
BehindU 5
Sarcasm you imbecile.
mizuki123 8
It's called sarcasm.. Maybe you should try it sometime.
darwinismisalive 3
Just making up for how loose her skin is?
darwinism 30
Spit on her and say "Ooppps, sorry. My condom just broke". That sucks OP. FYL
Permenio 4
Whoosh! That went right over you head 28. Get a sense of humor.
rosesofash860 8
And I was taught by my ELDERLY GRANDMA that age is no excuse for bad behavior. And to get respect you got to give it.
jdengel 0
well it's true
fishboy123 7
she sounds like a lovely lady, you sound like a tramp
Pandacupcakelove 26
Awww but that's not how meemas should be! They should call you moonpie and ask if you want another cookie :(
WretchedOnyx 29
Because they're nummy nummy and they could just eat you up?
Pandacupcakelove 26
Bazinga (:
rosesofash860 8
Sheldon is that you? Do you need me to sing you soft kitty?
Pandacupcakelove 26
Yes, please. This FML upset me so much :(
mariah_victoria 0
Spongebob o.o I called that.
Shadow_Phantom 26
*sigh* Old people, more often than not, are such prudes... FYL.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Well, look at the time in which they grew up. (being honest and sincere, not disrespectful)
rosesofash860 8
Age is no excuse for bad behavior. Wisdom from my grandma! :)
AbbyAbyss 5
How did I get "rude puddles" from "prudes"?! I need some sleep...
tony1891 22
and you don't have to be wrinkled as a pug. Oh wait. maybe she does. lol
Chandler1Bing 0
That's why the lady is a tramp.